Remote control to change the station. But that won't change your situation.

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--Hey guys, have you heard of Breaking Bad. It’s a pretty good show. HO-LY SH-IT with not !, not !!, but !!! Incredible. episode because really all we were missing from these seasons was a good ol’ fashioned train robbery. And it worked?! Yeah, right up to the point where Walter’s reverse Midas touch showed up and Landry/Todd, well you saw. The whole episode was a joy ride and then crash. RIP spider boy.

Nice swerve on Lydia. She’s going to bite the gang in the ass at some point and I imagine the biggest chunk will come from Mike’s ass.
Emo McGee – Good one Hank.
Check out the big brain on Jesse this season.
Mike’s Line O’ The Week – “Everyone sounds like Meryl Streep with a gun to their head.”

--Not even the sight of Annie’s Boobs got me past the ten minute mark of Animal Practice.

--Louie on a rug and not just any rug, but an IKEA rug. “It’s flat, it’s blue, it goes on the floor, it’s not coated with AIDS, and it’s not a portal to a netherplace. It doesn’t make me cum, but it’s fine.” If IKEA doesn’t have this on television within the next week…
The best part of Louie last week was watching those old comedy clips of Louis C.K., Sarah Silverman, and Marc Maron. Louie was damn near unrecognizable. The falling out and reconciliation with Dane Cook last season played far better than this season’s with Marc Maron, but maybe that’s because I had no idea what it was about and they didn’t tell us.

--Monchichi clown bubbles? Damn, Wilfred got real last week…or at least as real a show with a talking dog at its center can be. But a talking dog is much more believable when Dwight Yoakum hears him too, right? I think that’s in the rules somewhere. Really strong Wilfred after some just good episodes.
If I was Allison Mack I’d have beat Ryan’s ass for his “I love you” in the morning to the “move-in” to the “break up.”
Wilfred – “Why do you think no dogs died in the holocaust? Because we knew it was coming.”

--Grosse Pointe Blank out on Blu-ray now? Time to revisit one of the best soundtracks ever and also a time when Jeremy Piven was tolerable and Minnie Driver was my #1.
Best use of "99 Luftballoons" and "Under Pressure" in a movie ever.

--The only thing sillier than race walking as an Olympic sport is getting caught doping for it. Please let this be the scandal that ends race walking as a sport. F’n run already.
Or try a real sport like a sport that as practice you send 500 texts a day. That’s what I’m talking about. 17-year-old Austin Wierschke is the Michael Phelps of the texting world. He just won $50,000 at the National Texting Competition that I’m sure ESPN will cover next year. The contest tests your speed, accuracy and dexterity with useful events like texting while blind-folded.

--Look officers, I don’t care what my mom tells you I did not push her…sure I “did rub dog crap on her face because she yelled at me,” but no, absolutely did not push…just want to be clear on that. Oh, Florida.


--I know you’re going to find this shocking, but the trailer for Red Dawn indicates it is going to suck in what looks like epic fashion.


--Of course Chris Johnson hit 5 HRs in his first 8 games in Arizona.  Because I have to have money on baseball, a lot of money, to watch it I had no idea Matt Albers was sporting a 2.00 ERA in Arizona's pen.

--I wasn’t looking for reasons to avoid Fox’s college football show with Erin Andrews and Eddie George, but them dancing to “Call Me Maybe” is reason enough.

--It's been at least two weeks since I've publicly stated my undying love for Alison Brie.


--Luther is crazy fun. Alice is just plain crazy. So the idea of a Luther spin-off with Alice in America is awesome in every way. Make it happen.

Questions, comments or if you really don't see yourself having fries again unless they're topped with kimchi...