Hands went up and people hit the floor. He wasted two kids that ran for the door.

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--The best Breaking Bad video on You Tube or at least the only one I’ve watched and said, “Wow, yo.”

--Louie was a little odd this week. Rather, more odd than usual. No stand-up again which isn’t unusual and just one storyline that was resolved in very un-Louie-like fashion. I did like the beginning where Louie’s youngest girl is sweetly playing the violin in what seems like a typical pretty Louie scene that spends time on a warm fuzzy before Louie stomps in and puts the kibosh on it. Also his confrontation with the Boston driver that starts with insults, moves to advice with an affectionate “queer” slur before ending in a hug.

--Didn’t really feel this week’s Wilfred. Not enough Wilfie and Ryan and too much of Ryan’s sister reverting to season one form, but she gets a pass what with her having a baby and all.

--The thing is that Chad Johnson was -250 to be cut from the Dolphins while wearing houseshoes.

--Paste did a 25 Best Sports Movies List and at 24 is Senna so it can’t be that bad of a list, right? Yeah, I’d put it in my top 10-15, but the fact that it’s on the list is mildly surprising. Fairly decent list with Major League and Raging Bull bookending it. Sure there’s no Rocky V, but no list is perfect. Give me Bull Durham (12) over Field of Dreams (10). I’ve never seen Bend It Like Beckham or Chariots of Fire, but I doubt either would have made my 25.

--Cannot wait for The Pass and Provisions.  Looking for forward to checking out Sparrow too.  Not to mention Dolce Vita opening back up next week. 

--I need Pawnee back in my life ASAP. Until then watching Andy deliver shaving cream high-fives, Tom “wrestle” Ron, and Ron devour bangers and mash will just have to do.

--From the things I’m still not sure I saw this week: Earl Campbell on Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives.

Seriously, Guy Fieri came off as a genuine fan of Earl. Did not see that coming.

--It’s pretty much an automatic reflex for me to step into the elevator and at the same time free my iPhone from the shackles of my pocket so I can check Twitter, check email, read whatever website I have up or just to simply avoid any type of conversation with whoever else is in the elevator. I didn’t make up the smartphone as a way to avoid human contact game, but I play the hell out of it. So when my hands were full the other day and I got on the elevator for a 30-story ride up I was dumbfounded when the other guy didn’t whip out his smartphone. Look dude, my hands are full and I can’t quite reach my phone, but what the hell is your excuse?! Now we both stand here and pretend the other isn’t there. Wake to make sh** awkard, a**hole.

--Not sure why Drudge felt the need to put an exclamation point at the end of the headline “Mississippi 35% Obese!” I mean a period or just the word “still” would’ve sufficed.

--Writing of obese, pizzabon from Cinnabon. As sign-inducing as that is I’m surprised it took this long.

                      

--HBO comedy series helmed by Christopher Guest? Intriguing. No debut date yet, but HBO has ordered eight episodes of it. Still doesn’t make up for the lack of Life and Times of Tim or Bored to Death in my life.

--H. Jon Benjamin to Suburgatory?! I watched it when my DVR was running on empty, but I may actually have to watch it the same week it airs now. Besides, a little or preferably a lot of Cheryl Hines is never a bad thing.

--A Hard Knocks spoof with The Daily Show prepping for the RNC and DNC by practicing at the MTC (Model Train Convention). I had no idea Obamacare was going to effect the model train industry.

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Hard News - Inside Correspondent Training Camp
www.thedailyshow.com

Jason Jones to model train/city builder – “You built this by yourself?”

Train freak – “By myself.”

Jason – “You didn’t build this. All those girls that rejected you! They built this!”

--50% off is pretty good, but when 50% off means you’re still asking for $50 for an autographed Steve Slaton 8x10 photo then try again Texans Store.  Good luck trying to find something creepier than a Matt Schaub football bust.

--Probably the best collection of wrestler run-ins from Deadspin yet, starring Vince McMahon at Phantom of the Opera, Scott Steiner at a strip club, Gangrel coming up short on airfare and one of the all-time greats, Norman Smiley!

--ICE IN RED WINE!!!! Like most things from the 90’s this is brilliant. Celebrity Guide to Wine – Steven Seagal, Dudley Moore, Peter Weller, Robert Loggia and oh so many more. Did I mention Steven Seagal?  I can't even imagine going to a Robert Loggia barbecue.

--I can’t think of two more psychotic actors than Tom Hardy and Michael Shannon so hell yeah let’s put them in a movie as brothers.

--Okay Bob’s Burgers. I’ve already gone over how awesome you’re going to be next season so telling us Jon Hamm is going to be the voice of a toilet is just overkill at this point.

--Roger Sterling/John Slattery on Arrested Development? Sweet. If acid is involved all the sweeter.

--If you feel like hating a little bit then by all means check out the Rich Kids of Instagram tumblr. Actually make that hating a lot. Actually don’t click it you’ll only get sick. Urge to kill rising.

Questions, comments or if you got paid in full…