Down with Mike D. and it ain't no hassle. Got the ladies of the eighties from here to White Castle.

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--Kind of feels like an incomplete week without a new Parks & Rec. Maybe that’s what contributed to me liking The Office for the first time in a long time. Although this Cathy/Jim stuff has the potential to piss me off to no end.

--Archer – “This car makes the Mach V look like a vagina.” I could listen to Archer talk to his non-responsive all day.
Krieger – “Push the red button!”
Archer – “Will it kill everyone?”
Krieger – “Push the blue button.”

--Baby doll spirit trees get me every time. I thought The River was okay for what it is. It’s not like I’m expecting something groundbreaking. Just an hour a week of hoping Teri Bauer still has amnesia and eventually Jack will have to come rescue her and kick some River ass.
In thought-I-knew-that-guy-from-somewhere – Joe Anderson – Across the Universe. Been way too long since I’ve watched that movie.

--GIF of the Week.


--Seriously CBS Sports, baseball boyfriends. I’m typing this on Wednesday, but I’m thinking maybe by the time I’ll actually post it CBS will realize the error of its ways.
“You can date him for as long as you like. Maybe he’s just good for one game.” Wink, wink, nudge, nudge, vomit, vomit.
All you need to know is right here on Zap2it.com.

--Being Elmo: A Puppeteer’s Journey starts its run on Netflix streaming February 21st.

--If you read anything today about mouth-to-anus recordings make it this from Eater. Plus you know you’ve always wanted to see how your body digests ramen.

--A Karate Kid sequel for Jaden Smith and Jackie Chan? Sounds about right, actually what took so long?

--Alex Morgan in body paint is how you sell a Swimsuit Issue.


--Maya Rudolph has gotten less annoying on Up All Night which is a pretty big compliment coming from me. Not that I’ll be watching her host SNL on February 18th. I will, however, be watching Sleigh Bells perform.

--Gary Busey bankrupt? I’m almost as shocked as I was when I read that Oil Can Boyd pitched under the influence of cocaine, like, a lot.

--The thing that struck me most about Will Ferrell doing the Hornets introductions is people said it reminded them of Jackie Moon and Semi-Pro. I was surprised to find there were people who actually watched Semi-Pro.

--If you wonder how one would go about spending $10,000 at Pizza Hut, wonder no more. But hurry only ten of these proposal packages are for sale. If there is still hope for America there will be ten of these packages still remaining come February 15th.

--Sorry Arby’s, but it’s too late for a “total relaunch.”

--Director Jason Reitman is doing a one-night only all-black screen reading of Reservoir Dogs. Nice. Nice Guy Eddie will be Anthony Anderson. I can see that. I can’t see Terrence Howard as Mr. Blonde. That has to be Idris Elba. Cuba Gooding Jr. as Mr. Orange works. Still no Mr. White or, oddly enough, Mr. Brown cast yet.

--Another week, another Paul Qui win on Top Chef. Unfortunately Edward Lee was sent packing. I like Edward and we’ll have him on Southbound Food this week although because of a conflict I won’t be able to ask him just how much of a pain in the ass Sarah while she was on his team for the BBQ challenge.
If you want to read a review of a complete takedown of a restaurant helmed by a Top Chef then this is what you’re looking for from The Dallas Observer. The Top Chef is Beaumont's own Tiffany Derry.

--Also on Southbound Food this week we have Chris Shepherd from Underbelly and Kevin Floyd from Hay Merchant (full beer list and menu here). Underbelly is a couple of weeks from opening and when it does it’s going to be part of one cool ass, tricked out lesbian bar turned restaurants and beer bar. As Frank Bullington and I left Uchi late the other night we saw Kevin inside Hay Merchant and he gave us a tour. I’m not nearly enough of a beer nerd to understand what I was looking at, but Frank had a good description calling their tap room the equivalent to Walt’s super lab on Breaking Bad. The cool part about the space is that there is meaning behind pretty much every piece of brick or painting or piece of wood in those places. From the random tap handles (Billy Beer) to the manhole cover to the bricks that used to be where the new Dynamo stadium is going to the private dining room. Just a really, really sweet looking place that is going to be packed this time next week.

--There will be zero reasons to watch Weeds if Justin Kirk exits the building before next season. He’s currently without a contract and has latched onto an NBC pilot. Good for him.

--Bronson Pinchot has joined Vanilla Ice with shows on DIY Network. Yeah, that’s about right. The Bronson Pinchot Project starts up next week, but I’m sure you knew that already.

--Everyone dogging Macauley Culkin needs to think about how they’d look if Mila Kunis left them.


--ESPN Films has announced a new doc will be produced focusing on Magic’s AIDS announcement cleverly titled The Announcement. Looking forward to it. I’ll never forget leaving school that day and hearing about it on 97.9 The Bizzox. They were cutting press conference clips into “Wind Beneath My Wings.” As most of you know AIDS took the life of Magic shortly thereaf…he’s what?!

Questions, comments or if you got your nephews to eat chicken by calling it bat and you’re not quite sure what the long-term ramifications are of that…