Just Plug Me In Just Like I Was Eddie Harris. You're Eating Crazy Cheese Like You'd Think I'm From Paris.

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--I’m not sure if I’ve ever been more impressed by a midseason turnaround like the one Spartacus: Blood and Sand pulled off. It was On Notice after two episodes, but as the season grew on it just got more and more entertaining (even without gratuitous nudity!). “Kill Them All” is second only to Breaking Bad’s “IFT” as most appropriate episode title of the year. The finale was what it had to be with the start of the revolt and all, but it was bittersweet. John Hannah/Batiatus and Lucy Lawless/Lucretia were fantastic in their roles. But you can’t stop the Spartacus/Crixus train, at least not yet. And I assume we will have that biyatch Ilithyia and a-hole Glauber in our future. Although not much is certain for the immediate future since non-Hodkin’s lymphoma dares to F with Sparty. I hope Doctore is back, dude is a bad man. Mira would also be nice to have as Spartacus’ girl. Lucretia and Ashur dead? Apparently Starz is developing a prequel series in the event the second season is delayed too long.
Spartacus: "Tomorrow then, one of us dies."
Crixus: "I fear it was always fated so."
Psych.

What goes around...

--Ty F’n Wigginton has 5 HRs. Astros have 3. We’ll follow the David Eckstein vs. Carlos Lee HR race all summer. As of 4/20 it’s Eckstein – 1 Lee – 0.

--Best TV News of the Week: Party Down’s second season premieres on Starz Friday night.

--Typical punk ass Kevin Garnett antics. Without committing a crime has any NBA player ever gone from as likable to unlikable as quickly as KG did after the Boston trade? Quentin Richardson was dead on when he called KG and Paul Pierce “actresses.”

--Strikeforce led off with one boring match between King Mo Lawal and Gegard Moussasi that lasted all five rounds. And I was pretty uninterested from that point on. Of course there was also a few other things going on like the NBA and NHL Playoffs, a crazy 20-inning baseball game and boxing on HBO. Of course I saw the melee at the end after Jake Shields’ impressive win. And let me say I am shocked! Shocked! That Nick and Nate Diaz were a part of that. Jake doesn’t beat GSP, but make it happen anyway.

--Judging by what I’m hearing I might actually have to go to the theater for Kick-Ass.

--Mad Men over in 2012?! Sounds like a good idea. July 25th is the exact date of the start of the next season. Esquire with more Christina Hendricks goodness.

Watermelons never looked so good.

--Nothing else in sports matches the intensity and drama of the Stanley Cup Playoffs. One of these days I’ll pay attention to the regular season, but I doubt it. I get my hockey fix in the postseason and this one has been crazy thus far.

--Kim K. and Cristiano Ronaldo?!

That's Kim Kardashian for you, never afraid to show you how she handles her kitty.

--Remember that kid you were in the 3rd grade with who dealt heroin? Yeah, me neither, but then I didn’t go to school in Pittsburgh. An 8-year-old at Turner Elementary decided to spur his business interests by handing out heroin samples. Little man handed out 50 to 60 small bags of heroin worth about $1,000 on the streetz. The bags had “Trust Me” stamped on them, which is a nice touch. However, The Man shut down his operation real quick before he could make some money off those fiending 5th graders.

--Aziz Ansari hosting the 2010 MTV Movie Awards will persuade me to find out where MTV is on my channel guide.

--And the winner is…us. Hayley Atwell from The Prisoner (and likely other stuff) is set to play Captain America’s girl.

--I’m not sure if this is a good thing, although they’re supposed to get away from the crap they’ve been doing, but VH-1 is set to introduce 44 new series by year’s end. Each show will fit under one category: music, celebrity, or “real life stories.” My guess is all the shows will fit comfortably under the crap umbrella VH-1 spread open years ago.

--I managed to fit in Moon, Don’t You Forget About Me, and Julie & Julia on Watch Instantly over the weekend. Moon was a trip, but after an hour and a half I felt I hadn’t really watched anything, if that makes any sense.
Don’t You Forget About Me was a tribute to John Hughes centered around the filmmakers’ desire to interview the private legend a few years ago. Always nice to see John Hughes’ film clips.
Amy Adams with a perfect imitation of Julie Powell. I mean I almost forgot I was watching Amy Adams. Meryl Streep was, I think, Julia Child. She was ok.
If you’re a Watch Instantly guy with a Twitter feed then I suggest following @feedfliks which keeps you up to date on what’s moving in and out of Watch Instantly status. For example, soon moving in is It Might Get Loud. Nice.

Awesome scene.

--Burn Notice has gotten two more seasons from USA, although calling them seasons is a stretch since the turnaround from last season to the next is like 2 months.

--Tracy Morgan has been making the rounds yet again for yet another movie that looks ehh, but he killed it on The Daily Show. Hasn’t seen Spider-Man because Tobey Maguire owes him $75. Hilarious.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Tracy Morgan
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Tea Party

--Only a couple more weeks (May 7th) until Friday Night Lights is back on NBC.

--Do not, I repeat, DO NOT take Lester Freamon’s tools. Holy crap, I wonder if Treme has more music in its hour than Glee? Nice to see ol’ boy Slim from The Wire. Live jazz strip clubs = genius. I highly recommend checking out The Times-Picayune’s Dave Walker’s review week to week. A lot of solid explanation on things you may not have known.

--Just when you think the fighting can’t get any more intense or deadly, boom, there’s an airfield to cross. Holy crap, the beach scene had nothing on the airfield fight. Apparently that crazy scene where the Marine started screaming in the middle of the night before being bashed to death in the head by another Marine’s shovel really did happen right in front of Sledge. Crazy. Peleliu was one horrific place to be.

--Writing of the playoffs how about the depleted Jazz taking a game in Denver to tie the series? Can’t wait for Game 3. Let’s see Game 2 was on Monday night so Game 3 is…yep, Friday, makes sense.

--Well duh Larry King’s 7th (8th?) divorce is because he went after his wife’s sister.

--Stormy Daniels will not run for a Louisiana Senate seat. Her statement compares herself to Sarah Palin and says her decision is not because she is an adult film star, but rather because she doesn’t have millions of dollars in backing. “We will keep fighting so that one day the voices of the dishwashers, cashiers, bus drivers and porn stars will be heard…”


--Bowl names have gotten more and more stupid over the years. So I’m glad to see the Emerald Bowl is no more. It’s been replaced by the Kraft Fight Hunger Bowl, which just rolls off the tongue and is way cooler sounding.

--Of course Jared Allen has unveiled a Mullet Generator app.

--I made it through an entire episode of Steven Seagal: Lawman once. Sure I was asleep two minutes in, but still I saw enough to recognize the importance and relevance of a landmark show like that. So it’s a sad day to me when production is halted because maybe, perhaps, probably Steven had sex slaves. Apparently that’s frowned upon even in Louisiana.

--Yes! Comedy Central has ordered a pilot from the Onion Sports Network. It also signed Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert through the next presidential election.

--There’s disgusting and then there’s Philly fan. Michael Vangelo took his 16 and 11-year-old daughters to a Phillies game last week. Apparently some idiot fans behind them were being drunk idiots and loudly cursing and all that. So Vangelo asked them to stop and got the typical beer and water response. So he told the usher and that group was kicked out. Another group started harassing him and his daughters and some disgusting piece of crap Matthew Clemens decided to take it up a notch. So he went over to where they were sitting, stuck two fingers down his throat and started throwing up on the family. Classy. Clemens of course then started hitting Vangelo, who is a cop, until some other fans jumped in and grabbed Clemens. Congratulations Philadelphia.

Questions, comments or if your car used to smell a lot different on the morning of 4/21 than it does these days…