--Thanks Cardinals and Packers for not wasting everyone’s weekend watching blowout football games. At least we didn’t have Joes Theismann and Gibbs and Tom Hammonds for all four games. That’s the best you could do NBC? Fox’s BCS announcers think you dropped the ball.
--Kevin Mitchell owes the IRS $4.2 million? Good luck collecting that. If Herschel Walker is looking for an old athlete to fight in the octagon I nominate Kevin Mitchell. That dude was and probably still is one scary BMF. Just ask a cat, any cat, I’m sure they all know about him.
--Vernon Davis is an honorary captain of the U.S. Curling Team?!
|The Colbert Report||Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c|
|Skate Expectations - Curling Team Tryouts - Colbert vs. Shuster|
--Look Scottie Pippen, if you're gonna agree to be part of a movie called Midgets vs. Mascots then you can't be all surprised when Gary Coleman hits you upside the head with a phone.
--I wouldn't have thought Pippen would make me laugh more last weekend than Barkley on SNL.
--No, guns aren't a laughing matter, but fining four Wizards players for laughing at Gilbert Arenas do his little bang-bang before a game is incredibly stupid.
--I like Joshua Clottey. They don't make them much tougher than Clottey. But Pacquiao/Clottey instead of Pacquio/Mayweather is as big a letdown as turning to NBC at 10:35 and getting Leno instead of Conan.
--How terrible does that Travolta movie, From Paris With Love, look? I'd rather see Battlefield Ea...well, maybe not. At least we have Wild Hogs 2 next year. That'll be a winner for sure.
--I could not stop rooting for a Battle Royal to erupt during the World MMA Awards show. Easiest category winner to predict: Henderson/Bisping KO of the Year. That also had the best presenter: Arianny. Toby Imada for Submission of the Year was an also easy winner.
Ring Card Girl of the Year
--Minka and Derek gonna get married in November?!
--Oh real shocking. Karl Malone = crazy. In his defense someone did scratch the court that he bought for his alma mater.
--Our Winter Drunk of the Week comes to us from Minnesota. ‘Twas there that a 41-year-old man was drunk off his arse, but trying to be a good citizen (although he might not have known it). Guy was walking around in the middle of a busy intersection snowblowing the roads. He was almost hit a couple of times before a cop got there and arrested him. Fortunately for drunk guy the snowblower was just a push model so no DWI, just a public intoxication. Unfortunately for commuters snow was left on the roads.
--This headline from Australia is pretty much all you need to know:
Mothers held to ransom as breast milk sharks charge $1000
--Marilyn Manson and Evan Rachel Wood engaged?!
--Jack White is only in about 12 bands so why not a solo album this year? Still on a wait from Netflix for It Might Get Loud.
--It should have taken making crappy commercials instead of domestic violence (allegedly) to get Charlie Sheen axed from Hanes spots.
--Look Jay you said you were gonna go away so just go the hell away and let Conan and Fallon be.
--J.R. Smith always has his head in the game….
....as long as the game is played in the clouds.
--I didn’t know how Chuck was going to set up season three, but three episodes in and it’s looking promising. Just don’t ask me to really believe that Chuck wouldn’t have jumped on that train in a second and disappeared with Sarah instead of spy training. You knew Casey and Chuck were going to end that first episode in classic Rocky style and it didn’t disappoint. Give me that scene and the Rocky scene in framed paintings please. Oh and R.I.P. Emmet, Wilson Phillips’ “Hold On” did make the death easier to take.
Questions, comments or if you want Jeffster to play at your wedding…