Friday, February 13, 2009

I've been dropping the new science and kicking the new k-nowledge. An M.C. to a degree that you can't get in college

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--I can't believe my boy Margarito is done for a year. I have no problem with the trainer, Javier Capetillo, being suspended forever. It's hard to believe he accidentally grabbed the wrong gauze from out of his bag, not once, but twice. But I do believe Antonio had no idea what Capetillo was doing. It sucks, but don't ask me to disregard everything that Margarito has ever achieved in the ring. Can't wait til he's back. Until then we have a nice tripleheader on HBO Saturday night. Sergio Martinez and Alfredo Angulo have been tearing it up so they're in separate bouts. Angulo was to face crazy man Ricardo Mayorga, but crazy man backed out. Sergio faces Kermit Cintron, which is promising. I'm also looking forward to seeing Ali Funeka and one of the best talkers in the sport, Nate Campbell face off. Solid, solid night of boxing on Valentine's. Natural pairing. And not much longer now until Juan Manuel Marquez meets Juan Diaz in a Loser Leave Juan match.

--We've got to wait until late August, but eventually we'll get Tarantino's Inglorious Basterds...

--Beer Gamers - 1 Lawmakers - 0. A Maryland Senator introduced a bill last month to ban our nation's most sacred games like Beer Pong and Flip Cup. So why did Senator Della Jr. give up the fight? You, the people of course. Della, "We're getting inundated with so many e-mails that I don't have the time to fool with it."

--Great one from Best Week Ever...

--Our Only in Florida Story of the Week comes to us from Bradenton. Mark Belanger (not the former Oriole shortstop) and his 8-year-old son were at an Albertson’s parking lot when Daddy told his son he was too woozy to drive. So Daddy let son get behind the wheel. That worked out great or the son nearly ran over two MLS coaches. Toronto FC trains in the area and the coaches were walking along when that crazy 8-year-old almost ran them over. Instead the 8-year-old decided to wreck into a tree….twice, presumably to make sure it was dead. The coaches called the cops. Cops get there ask Daddy WTF? Daddy says he let his son drive because “he wanted a bonding moment with his son.” Daddy goes to get his wallet and promptly falls down flat on his face busting open a nasty cut on the bridge of his nose. Daddy’s night got better when his son told police that Daddy takes “liquid medicine in order to feel better” as he pointed to a bottle of Canadian whiskey. For some reason this medicine made Daddy resist arrest and try to kick out the cop car’s windows.

--If you've never seen Dogtown and Z-Boys, the 2001 version, find it, watch it. It's great stuff and beautifully directed by Stacy Peralta who in the movie plays Stacy Peralta. Apparently Stacy has himself a Crips and Bloods documentary out now. Crips and Bloods: Made in America...

--Baseball books don't get any better than anything '86 Mets related. Even though it inevitably brings up one of my first and worst Houston sports letdowns it's always interesting to read how exactly ballplayers managed to balance alcohol, cocaine, assorted other drugs, wives, girlfriends, Kevin Mitchell, etc. Darryl Strawberry finally is coming out with what he can remember in "Straw: Finding My Way." Let's see what Dar-ryl has to offer...
"We were the boys of summer. The drunk, speed-freak, sneaking-a-smoke boys of summer." They snuck smokes? I assumed they smoked while in the field.
"Beer was the foundation of our alcoholic lifestyle. "We hauled around more Bud than the Clydesdales. The beer was just to get the party started and maybe take the edge off the speed and coke." Amen to that.
Of course there has to be stories about picking girls out from the crowd as Darryl relates a story regarding a teammate who was pleasured in the most oral of ways...
"I was jealous. When I saw her heading back to her seat, I gave her a sign. She smiled, turned right back around, and met me in that same little room . . . I had to be quick and run back out on the field."

--After breaking Vinnie's and JD's hearts Mandy Moore is getting married to Ryan Adams who apparently used to date Parker Posey. Gotta love Parker Posey. Well except for The Coneheads, but then right after she did Dazed and Confused and killed in every Christopher Guest movie.

--Your Dumbass Brothers of the Week come to us from Warrensburg, New York. 'Twas there in the late afternoon Joseph and Kenneth Weiler lost track of Joseph's five-year-old son. They thought abduction so they called the police. Police come over and of course find 68 pot plants in the basement. I mean, just how cliche. Dumb-asses. Oh yeah, the kid was hiding in the closet.

--For all the Gamers in the Michigan area who don't have Valentine's plans don't worry. The Binder Park Zoo has your back. Over there for $50 you can sign up for the Zoorotica program. Uh huh. They'll take you on a tour and talk about particular animal's reproduction habits and oh yeah baby, you get to watch. Somehow there's a waiting list for this.

--If you're in the Atlanta area you have 10 Waffle Houses where you can eat by candlelight. Thirty-two stores are offering the scattered, smothered, and covered Valentine's meal.

--Because you want to relive the days of sodas past...I had no idea there were Hubba Bubba sodas. There's a

--Tell me Chris Brown didn't change his Facebook status to "single."

Questions, comments or if the smoke monster is one of your top 10 all-time tv characters...

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