Thursday, October 02, 2008

"Now my name is M.C.A. I've got a license to kill. I think you know what time it is it's time to get ill.

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--Chris Rock killed it again though the cutting between the three different locations was annoying.

--I gave Little Britain America 5 minutes, which was 3 minutes too long. Still need to check out Life and Times of Tim, which looks much funnier than those Brits.

--Letterman is gonna tape a show this Friday so he can comment on the VP debate between Palin and Biden. Gee, I wonder who's gonna feel the Letterman wrath.

--Ryan Reynolds completed one of the biggest upgrades in history going from being engaged to Alanis Morisette to being married to Scarlett Johansson.

--Your Fantasy Football Gone Wrong Story of the Week comes to us from (me, really f'n Favre! 6 TDs! F(U)avre!) Florida, of course. 'Twas there that a 35-year-old guy was just a bit upset about his the outcome of his fantasy game. So he did what any of us would do in that situation. He grabbed a knife, told his roommate to move out, when ignored he stabbed the roommate's book and that's when roommate decided to call 911. The cops came and the guy told them about his fantasy game, but said he was just joking around with the knife and the book abuse. These unsympathetic cops who probably win every week while spending just five minutes on their lineups decide to arrest the guy and so the guy takes off running. Yeah, Taser - 1 Disgruntled Fantasy Owner - 0.
And really we need to know what pushed this guy over the edge. Going against Favre? Benched Favre? Gets points off for Kurt Warner turnovers? Started Westbrook? So many questions left unanswered.

--Sklars with dating advice from Rodman. Promising...

--MGM is remaking Fame?!

--Who'd want to frame Heather Locklear, well besides a former US Weekly employee.

--Remember that Nebraska teacher who took her student (male, so it's okay, right?) to Mexico for a little south of the border playtime. Kelsey Peterson was sentenced this week to six years in prison. She was on GMA and got this awesomely terrible line out, "We didn't see age anymore....In my mind he quit being a teenage me, he was a man." Ooookay. In another interview her attorney is making a heckuva argument for her. He says the kid, who was 13 at the time, is likely at least 16 so apparently that makes everything okay. Hell, the Texans have a better defense than that.

--If you want to be disgusted by a non-Houston based sportswriter writing about Ike/Astros...

--NBC Sports' Dick Ebersol has a 25-year-old son who is the lucky bastard overhead smashing Maria Sharapova.

--A Yogi and Boo-Boo CGI/live-action movie?!

--Big surprise The Shield is kicking ass in its final season. Unfortunately just eight episodes left.

--David Beckham spent Jermaine Dupri's birthday party hanging out with a fake Lloyd from Entourage?!

--Let's go back to Florida for more fun and frivolity. Jonathon Guabello and his girl closed down a bar and went home early Wednesday morning. He wanted a little drunk sexytime. She wanted drunk sleep. Jonathon wouldn't take no for an answer and I guess he asked his hands if they were down for a little below the belt handshake. The arms must not have cooperated because he went and got his gun and shot himself in the arm. That'll learn those stupid appendages. He then went and started threatening his girlfriend who then had sex with him because she had never had sex with a guy with a fresh bullet wound. Not really, he threatened her, walked into the kitchen, banged his head on something and knocked himself unconscious. She called the cops.

--Nice to have the girls and boys back!

--Kanye had a Curb Your Enthusiasm inspired comedy that was too hardcore for HBO?!

--Maybe you saw that guy who caught home run balls on back to back nights two weeks ago at Yankee Stadium. Yeah, he also caught the last home run ball at Shea off the bat of Carlos Beltran.

--Kendra Wilkinson already is done with Hank Baskett and has moved on to GGW's Joe Francis?!

--Homer Simpson is gonna vote Obama in a November 2nd episode?!

Questions, comments or if you're gonna hafta get back to Katie on that one...

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