You Know That I'm Gone And I'm A Tell You All Why

Who Wants Some of Obama?

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--How awesome was it when Roger Clemens tried to take down Vioxx? With his yeah, I'll go talk to Congress tell them about this Vioxx. Hilarious. You're doing a great job Roger, top-notch. Personally I could care less whether or not he did or didn't. I think he's a Hall of Famer, but apparently he could give a "rat's ass" about that. What gets on my f'n nerves is this need for Congress to get in on this and have another hearing that'll amount to nothing. We have a f'n war that's been going on for years in Iraq, a potential war in Iran, craziness in Pakistan, and oh yeah, just a few issues here at home. Did any of us elect officials to help with baseball's steroids problem? I didn't. It's a joke.

--Warner Brothers is going all-in with Blu-Ray. Lovin' that.

--First off on Gladiators, how much larger are those buckets in PowerBall than they used to be. You shouldn't be able to shoot in there like that. Anyway, this show could use male gladiators like Buff Bagwell and Scott Steiner. Who wouldn't watch this if Scott Steiner was going up against normal, non-roided humans? Geez remember in the old one when there were nothing but rings and now there are what, four? How cool is that guy who screams like a Wolf? How about that awesome music, Na Na Hey Hey Goodbye and Another Bites the Dust?! Earthquake is a nice, stupid addition. Yeah, I'm thinking I'm not gonna be able to watch another episode. Just terrible. Holy sh**!! Venus' comeback in The Eliminator was the greatest comeback in sports history! This is just awful.

--Yeah, Floyd doesn't need boxing anymore his music is gonna make him mad money...


--The Iron Chef America match this week was/is my boy Mario Batali v. The Naked Chef.
Food Network needs to start replaying the old Iron Chefs again
By the way, The Professor Alton Brown has re-upped with the network for three more years. Apparently some sea version of his Feasting on Asphalt is on the horizon.

--It probably won't happen, but some UK entertainment site was saying that a possible Extras spinoff could happen featuring Barry and Stephen Merchant (the agent). That would be a VERY good thing.

--Welcome back Daily Show and Colbert Report. You've been gone far too long.

--I checked out Black Dahlia because it was on cable and I thought my inebriation would make it entertaining. Apparently there's not enough Jager in the world to make Josh Hartnett a half decent actor.

--Getting closer and closer to Lost coming back. Must...be...patient...

--Loved Pan's Labyrinth so I can't wait to check out Guillermo Del Toro's The Orphanage. That looks crazy.

--Someone named Gemma Arterton is your new Bond Girl.

--Yeah, note to Will Bynum: When you're in Israel you probably don't want to get into arguments with what the paper described as members of the African Hebrew Israelite Nation of Jerusalem who believes they are descendents of the Ten Lost Tribes of Israel. It just doesn't sound like a good idea. Apparently it was Will's b-day and he and some of his boys got into an argument perhaps about a girl Will tried to hit on who was with the H.I.C. (I assume they abbreviate, it's just easier). So Will and teammate Vonteego Cummings are leaving the club and according to the paper they were "confronted by five youths and then stones and fists started flying." Stones?! Only one way to answer when someone brings stones to a carfight, yep, Will is accused of running to his car and then running over one of the youths. He made it back to his place, but the cops came a callin' and he says he didn't know he ran over anyone, but eyewitnesses kinda have a different story.

--At some point or another we've all been stuck in an elevator with a hot chick and then had relations with said hot chick who is about to get married (at least that's what Cinemax tells me, I'm still waiting). In Niles, Illinois two women were stuck in an elevator for two days. (Sounds like it has potential, huh?) They were cleaning ladies. (Well, maybe they...)they were mother and daughter. Anyway, two finish the story, aw f it who cares now?

--Seriously this dude named Scott Gomez Jr. is serving time in a Denver jail. He's tried breaking out twice. So what do you do when you've tried to break out twice and you keep getting your ass kicked by inmates and prison guards on a daily basis? Yeah, you sue. Gomez is suing alleging that guards beat him and didn't do enough to stop him from breaking out. I sue you for making it so tempting to try to escape, this should work out for the plaintiff.

--So hilarious to see Chris Rock's Never Been Scared on Comedy Central Sunday night and see him cracking on Dubya and other things that are sadly still very topical despite it being filmed nearly four years earlier. If you don't remember this particular Rock jewel it's the one where he says his only responsibility as a father is to keep her off the pole. He also talks about you married folk...


--If you ever find yourself in Wisconsin and come across someone named Bryan Hathaway run, don't walk. This sick mofo was found guilty in April of 2005 for killing a horse in order to have sex with it. The sicko did 18 months in jail, got out and promptly had relations with a dead deer. This animaniac, necrophiliac is back in jail because, well I think it's obvious.

--Apparently Brooke Hogan is hoping and even auditioned for the next Dancing With The Stars. They audition now?!

--Wow, awesome move Papa Spears, Britney breaks down and you bring in Dr. Phil. Your move Britney. What? You walk out? Damn smartest move Britney made since, well...

--If you're keeping score at home Jose Lima is apparently close to signing to play in Korea next season. So yeah, there ya go. Seriously would Lima not be the 2nd starter behind Roy?

--Rest easy America we're getting another season of The Two Coreys.

--If you're keeping score at home Eko from Lost and whoever he was in Oz will play Heavy Duty in that G.I. Joe movie and Marlon Wayans will be Ripcord.

--I love me some Starship Troopers. Starship Troopers: Marauders is getting going and Casper Van Dien will be back. Probably need to find a way to bring Denise Richards' character back from the dead and definitely need the brain, Doogie, back as well.

--There was one reason to watch the GMAC Bowl...


Questions, comments, or if you just got Bobby Flay's Mesa Grill Cookbook and Tom Colicchio's Think Like A Chef and you know damn well you ain't making one of those recipes within the next year...