Wednesday, April 11, 2007

No Sleep Til'...

Sadly the first season of Friday Night Lights is in the books, So my new early morning work ritual is looking at the Chronicle sports section online and I noticed David Barron took another shot at the show and asked readers to send in their cliches FNL could use next season, so I calmly sent in a comment, which follows...

cliche like your countless columns breathlessly retelling jim nantz's latest comments on golf? this just in, it's a freakin' tv show. it's a little about football, but it's more about people in a small town and yes, in this case texas. after the first episode you stated you were going to watch every show and list the inaccuracies every week. yeah, didn't ever see that list. wonder why that is? maybe it's because you're the only curmudgeon who doesn't enjoy this show for the popcorn entertainment it is. yeah, the football is unrealistic and dillon probably shouldn't have won every single game on the last play of the game. however, beyond you, who holds that against them? lay off one of the rare full hours of entertaiment one of the big networks has to offer. you don't agree this is better than watching fat people lose weight or people eating worm-wrapped cockroaches or sanjaya or billy ray dancing? now go call one of the usual suspects and get some boring, been there-done that comments and offer it up as your tv-radio notebook instead of doing something crazy like mentioning what's going on with the three sports radio stations in the area or a word on the big ufc event that was just in our backyard. anxiously looking forward to your next groundbreaking notebook...

anywho, we exchanged pleasant emails and are having a Friday Night Lights marathon next week unless he's on the phone getting Jim Nantz's takes on the NBA playoffs.
Happy Schedulemas

There's nothing like the hope and promise that NFL Schedulemas brings each year. Let's take a look at the team co-owned by Bob McNair and Vince Young...the pretty much worthless strength of schedule ratings have the Texans in the middle of the pack. The boys start off at home against Larry Johnson who will have about 125 yards and two TDs, but I'm feeling all warm and fuzzy inside so let's give the Texans a win. 1-0. Next up, hopefully David Carr and the Panthers, but assuming Carr doesn't play that'll be a loss. 1-1. Entering Week 3 the Colts still will not have lost since the Texans beat them last year and this year Indy resumes its annual sweep of Houston. 1-2. There's no way Matt Schaub loses in Atlanta, right? Right, 2-2. Beating the Dolphins at home puts them at 3-2. Then comes a 3-game losing streak against the Jaguars on the road (no Carr, no Jax win), Vince here, and then at the Chargers. 3-5. Some guy names Reggie Bush comes in after the bye and I'm thinking an OT TD pass and catch (yes, he'll do both) to drop Houston to 3-6. They'll beat the Browns to get to 4-6 and then back to 4-7 after they play Vince again (at least there's no PacMan, so safety won't be an issue). Then they come home for the crappy Bucs and get to 5-7. 6-7 after they beat the Broncos on a Thursday night technically primetime game. Can't see them beating the Colts on the road so 6-8 heading home for the finale against the Jaguars and the Texans go out with a win to go 7-9. The sky's the limit for the long as that sky is on planet mediocrity.

--What a great Monday Night Football schedule! I mean the chance to see those exciting Ravens and equally exciting Broncos three times apiece is just FANTASTIC.

--I can't believe Brett Favre didn't get his usual possible MNF finale at Lambeau.

--The Cowboys are on MNF one more time than the Texans are this season. Dallas does have at three Sunday night games even before the flex scheduling kicks in.

--All your fantasy Colts will be playing the Texans in most leagues' championship week (Week 16).


Did pudgy little Bonzi get his feelings hurt because big, bad Jeff Van Gundy wasn’t playing him 30 minutes a game. Whatever. It’s real simple, it’s okay to break up with a girlfriend with a text message or even end your marriage that way (see Britney), but you don’t quit on your team via text. And that’s exactly what Bonzi did. Pathetic and completely predictable. He was out of shape from day one. Just about every day after that he was banged up to one degree or another. I don’t know why he got so much love from callers wanting to see him in the playoffs and thinking he would make a difference. He wouldn’t have and JVG comes out and says he’s going to play Bonzi down the stretch to better gauge what he might be able to do come playoff-time. And how does Wells respond? With a freakin’ text and not even to Jeff, but to Keith Jones. Ridiculous. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out. No really, don’t let it, your fat ass may break it and you know you’ll be out 6 weeks if that happens.
If you were wondering he did actually score two points this season.

--Even people who can’t spell reliever are making fun of Brad Lidge…

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--The NFL has Pac Man and MTV has Jason from Laguna Beach. Four arrests in nine months for that idiot who used some unkind adjectives towards an arresting cop last Sunday. It seems the cop wanted Jason to get up off the floor after he had passed out. Jason used the n-word, the gay derogatory a.k.a. English cigarette, and also called the cop “a poor f***.” Someone needs to get his ass kicked.

--Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson?!

--Not surprisingly The Sopranos dropped almost two million viewers from its sixth season premiere last March to its premiere last Sunday. Also not surprisingly Entourage improved by about a million from its last premiere.
Raise your hand if you want AJ to bite it.

--Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel have made up?! Step 1: Cut a hole in the box.

--The Sun is throwing this out there to see if it sticks, but Britney and Luke Walton?!

--I would have liked to seen it a little more drawn out, but it was just a matter of time before Vic got over on Kavanaugh. He does have that other job as the Last King of Scotland going for him. How about when Corinne busted Kavanaugh's ass in front of the barn? Hopefully Vic gets smart and the focus shifts to that mass murder discovered two weeks ago. Vic ain't getting smart, is he?

--In some surely crappy movie Willa Ford will play Anna Nicole.

--For the first time in a while 24 came through with a solid effort. I was getting bored with Fayed. Bring it Chinese Consul!

--Giada and Tiki are going to host the fourth hour of the Today Show?!

--Carmen Electra’s Naked Women’s Wrestling League?! “The Mouth of the South” Jimmy Hart is involved?!

--It’s popular in Japan so how long until an American network picks up a show based on Air Sex. Yeah, like Air Guitar.

--A fourth Friday with Cube and Chris Tucker?!

Questions, comments or if you’re seeing The Killers Friday night in Austin…

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