You lie and aspire to be as cunning

And Then There Were Four

Another weekend of the Madness and now we’re down to the biggest of the big boys. I had it coming down to Florida and Georgetown and I see no reason to back off of that now. That Hoyas win was just incredible and a fitting end to the Elite 8 action. Wha happened North Carolina? There was no way the Tar Heels should have lost that game. 1 for 23 over a 15-minute span?! Up 11 with 12:22 to go?! If he doesn’t get the Most Outstanding Player honor, Jeff Green should at least collect Tournament’s Most BMF. Sure he walked all over the place in that Vandy win, but that was a helluva shot. Greg Oden and Roy Hibbert in one game and then a rematch of last year’s title game follows with UCLA and Florida. Yeah, Saturday might be a pretty good day.

--Every Hoya starter put up at least 13 points. Arizona is the only other team that can say it did that over the last 10 years in the tourney.

--Tyler Hansbrough had a shot at a perfect 16 for 16 from the free throw line, which would have tied a tournament record. He made his first 14 before typifying UNC’s day by bricking his last two in OT.

--Why CBS went with James Brown over Gus Johnson is beyond me.

--Freshmen were made eligible for the AP All-American teams beginning in 1972. Since then only two freshmen made the first team. In 1983 Wayman Tisdale made it from OU and in 1990 LSU’s Chris Jackson received the honor. Kevin Durant and Greg Oden made it this year. Oden the first Ohio State All-American since?? Since 1992 when Jim Jackson did it.

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--Easily the best part of Peyton’s trip to SNL…


--The Rockets’ bid for a season-high 6-game winning streak failed yet again. Half of the league, Houston included, hasn’t put together at least a 6-game win streak over the past two seasons.

--Thanks for the memories Pullo and Vorenus. Thanks for exposing yourselves Atia, Octavia, Cleopatra, Niobe, Lyde, and assorted prostitutes. You could make worse purchases on DVD than these two seasons of Rome. Just great, great stuff. I love Deadwood, but Rome was superior. Now let’s see what Showtime can do with The Tudors.


--Apparently crocodiles aren’t stupid…


--Shockingly ESPN did something smart and said goodbye to Joe Theismann who never should have been put in the MNF booth in the first place. Jaws takes his place and that’s a very good thing.


--I hope you’re sitting down…Anna Nicole died of an accidental overdose of medication. Yeah, that must’ve been a real tough call for the doctor.

--Hugo Weaving (Agent Smith) will voice Megatron in the Transformers movie. Good choice.

--One more week until The Shield’s 6th season!!


--I’m not sure, but I think Willis McGahee is happy to be out of Buffalo, "Coming from Miami, I was used to partying, going out, just having something to do every night. Restaurants, whatever. Going to Buffalo, it was like hitting a brick wall. Like, 'Damn!' Can't go out, can't do nothing. There's an Applebee's, a TGI Friday's, and they just got a Dave & Busters. They got that, and I'm like, 'What the?' And, you know, the women . . . ."

--Seriously Cube, Are We Done Yet?

--Now that’s what I’m frackin’ talking about Battlestar Galactica. Crazy. Brilliant move with “All Along the Watchtower.” Now if we just didn’t have to wait until next January for the next season.

--Landon Donovan is still a relevant soccer player.


--In terrible final destination news we head to Rhode Island. The other night 14-year-old Darien Plass was killed when the car he was driving smacked into a utility pole. A few hours later a bunch of his friends set up an impromptu memorial service at the site of the crash on the side of the road. One friend, 18-year-old Andrew Coit, hung around after everyone left to play one more song on his guitar for his friend. At some point during the song a car came by and hit Andrew killing him instantly. The car sped off before the driver could be questioned.

--I mentioned this a couple of weeks ago, but now there’s more to the story so let’s head to Michigan. That’s where we find the mother of the year candidate, mommy’s boyfriend, and mommy’s 15-year-old daughter. Mommy had surgery and so since she was afraid her man would leave her if she couldn’t pleasure him mommy, boyfriend, and daughter signed a contract making daughter available for boyfriend’s sexual needs. This was to go on for two months and what did the daughter get out of it? Daughter got piercings, hair dye treatments, and permission to spend the night with her own boyfriend. Oh yeah, she also got to attempt to commit suicide, stay at a psychiatric hospital and is currently in therapy. Mommy’s boyfriend got 15 years for each of four counts of criminal sexual conduct. The classy boyfriend was also charged similarly for relations with a 12-year-old girl.

--Your Father of the Year candidate comes to us from Long Island. The other night cops saw Gary Dillon pushing a baby carriage along Long Island highway at 3:40 AM. The officers asked him what’s up and he honestly and quickly told them he was looking for crack. He and his 5-month-old son were walking around looking for crack since 10:30 the previous night. Yeah, Mr. Dillon faces child endangerment charges.

--Butler County in Ohio came up with an ingenious way to hopefully help a little with deadbeat dad problems. Officials up there have decided to place pictures of the top 10 men wanted for nonpayment on pizza boxes. Unfortunately only three pizzerias are complying and since August the boxes are responsible for one arrest.

Questions, comments or if you know how crazy Hooch is…