Friday, February 10, 2006

Opening Ceremonies!!!!!!!!

Same Old

The Rockets are six games back of the 8th spot with five teams standing in their way. The Rockets should be better than those five teams in front of them, but they aren’t. These guys should bring it every night, but they don’t. They know the problems, but they don’t fix ‘em. They have open shots, but they don’t make ‘em. They have two all-stars neither of which is willing to kick this team in the ass. They have a coach that can’t reach his players. They have an arena that resembles a near empty library. Thankfully they have just 33 games left in this maddening season.

--The Rockets are now the only team in the league without a win in its own division. Congratulations.

--The Mavericks win streak has hit 13 and the most remarkable part is that in all 13 wins they’ve held their opponents under 100 points. Josh Howard has led the team in scoring in five of those games. The Mavs are holding teams to just over 92 points per for the season, which is 7th best in the league. If they get number 14 Friday night versus the Nuggets they’ll tie their franchise mark.

--The Mavericks have more wins on the road (19) than the almighty Pistons (18).

--Kenyon Martin had a friend intimidate Denver fans that were getting on K-Mart?! This sounds promising.

--Congratulations to Pau Gasol for becoming the first Grizzle in their history to make the All-Star team.

--The Spurs and Grizzlies are the only teams holding their opponents under 90 points a game.

--The Pistons are 22-1 when scoring 100+. When their opponents are fortunate enough to break 100 Detroit is still 8-2.

--The Knicks lead the league in turnovers and personal fouls. Out-standing.

--Chris Wilcox to the Timberwolves for Eddie Griffin and Minnesota hasn’t jumped on this why?

--The Hornets were last in attendance last year and are now 7th. They’re going back to New Orleans why again?

--The Professsssoooorrrr!!!!!!! has joined the Salem Stampede of the IBL.

Grammys and Other Bits O’ Honey

U2 is hands down, no doubt my favorite band of all-time. I’ve been to countless concerts and am always amazed. The boys can experiment with whatever they want and I will buy it and heap praise upon it. However, there is no way that Kanye West’s Late Registration should not have walked away with Album of the Year. It’s really not even all that close. The Grammys had some great live performances, but keep making the same old mistakes with the same old acts. Ridiculous. The one slam dunk of the night should have been “Golddigger” walking away with Record of the Year. But noooooo, somehow, some way a Green Day song won. This despite the fact that Green Day’s album, which is solid, was released two freakin’ years ago and won Best Album last year!! WTF?! Are you people stupid or do you just not care about black people?!

--Kanye and Pam Anderson?!

--Why is Evander Holyfield at the Grammys? Can we not get him and Master P in a dance-off on Dancing with the Stars?

--I know very little about Chris Brown, but having Miss California USA on your arm at the Grammys is pretty strong. I mean the guy is 16 and this wasn’t Miss Teen California he was with.

--I’ll put the over/under on years before Fantasia appears on Celebrity Fit Club at two.

--Mary J. Blige and U2 were awesome.

--Please go away Madonna. You’re not needed any longer.

--I saw someone with a Reggie Bush jersey on, but alas no Vince Young jersey sightings.

--Wu-Tang together again!!

--Jay-Z has a new Dr. Dre produced album coming out in June?!

--Jay-Z, Linkin Park, and Paul McCartney doing “Yesterday”?!

--Mission Impossible III's new theme is going to have the flavor of Kanye and that's a very good thing.

--A two-disc set of remixed Prince hits will be released March 21st. Unfortunately "Darling Nikki" isn't on it. What’s up with that?

--Fifteen years ago this week M.C. Hammer made his memorable acting debut portraying himself and also "Reverend Pressure" (as I'm sure you remember) on Amen. Fourteen years ago Mint Condition's "Pretty Brown Eyes" entered the Top 40 chart. Even better eighteen years ago "Parents Just Don't Understand" was released.

--Jessica Simpson and Maroon 5’s Adam Levine?!

--Each Grammy presenter and performer received a gift basket worth a little over $53,000 apiece. Included in the basket is a 12-month bi-coastal gym membership, an Elliott Lucca handbag, $700 worth of skin care products, and a high-tech blender which I can only assume is a Magic Bullet.

--Kelly Clarkson and her man Graham Colton are no more. If you’d like to learn more about Clarkson’s CD contact her publicist Matt Jackson.

--I would go into some details about Clay Aiken’s alleged gay tryst, but you don’t want to hear them and I don’t want to type them.

--The man, the myth, the legend Keith Sweat has a new album out titled “Welcome to the Sweat Hotel” and as a coincidence he is opening up his own hotel the S Hotel next week in Atlanta.

--A Smashing Pumpkins reunion?!

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--The latest advertising spots…the white lines in your parking lot. Oh boy.

--Nacho Libre?! Jack Black as a luchador, what’s not to love? has your trailer.

--Neve Campbell is engaged to British actor John Light. Dude was in Band of Brothers so he's all right by me. I heard a lot of rumors about a Band of Brothers type of show dealing with the Pacific theatre, but who knows. That was one helluva series.

--Our Southern Stupidity story of the week comes to us from Lonoke, Arkansas. There the chief of police Jay Campbell and wife Kelly are in a bit of hot water. The couple allegedly stole antique jewelry from a home and later pawned it. Big chief also hooked up with some bail bondsmen to cook up some methamphetamine in order to frame someone else. Uh-huh. The chief’s wifey, well, she’s accused of ordering the release of two inmates. Why? Well to take her to ballparks, the chief’s office, and a hotel all in the name of s-e-x. Fan-tastic. She is also charged with theft, residential burglary and taking prohibited items into jail. I can imagine the items. Oh, also the good mayor of Lonoke was arrested for corruption. Gotta love the Durty South.

--Regarding the engagement of Zach Braff and Mandy Moore. Nevermind. Probably just a ploy to make Vince jealous. It won't work Mandy. He's over you. When's Aquaman come out??

--How stupid and irresponsible a parent can you be, Britney?

--This season is the best for 24, perhaps ever, but how much longer do we have to wait until she brightens our lives again?

--Tell me I did not see that bird or pigeon or whatever crap on Katie Couric as she was releasing it in Milan in some kind of lame Olympics celebration.

--Gotta love seeing Vic kill Cavanaugh and internal affairs on The Shield. But to use a wrestling analogy I think Vic used his finisher and unfortunately Cavanaugh kicked out and is ready to show his stuff. Uh-oh.

--Tony Kornheiser on Monday Night Football will probably be good, but Joe Theismann will no doubt make it fantastic, must-see TV….or maybe not. Let’s face it Paul “now watch this” Maguire carried Joe.

--This new Matthew McConaughey movie looks all right, but I’m supposed to believe the best he can pull is Sarah “it’s not a horse face, oh wait it is” Jessica Parker.

--Nice job, Richie Sambora. Moron. How ya gonna screw up a marriage to Heather Locklear.

--Jessica’s best friend and assistant CaCee Cobb and Nick Lachey?! This has potential.

--Kelly Osbourne in rehab again?! Shocking. Absolutely shocking.

Questions, comments or if you like the cars, the cars that go boom…

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