Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Dropping science like when Galileo dropped the orange

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--I’ve been fortunate enough to be part of three Seinfeldian Mock Drafts now. I went the team building route the last couple years going time travel first before selecting all the U.S. World War II veterans last year. That’s right I travel time with the greatest generation having my back. This year I went with ecstasy because frankly my guys needed a little happiness and what better for post-traumatic stress disorder and anxiety problems than X? Seriously, I'm all ears.
I didn’t want to bring the SMD down emotionally so I didn’t share this story on the air, but we travelled 40 years ahead in time and right into into the zombie revolution. We lost a lot of good men before I could jump us back to the non-zombie-oic era which is what this will be known as in the future. I won’t tell you at what point the uprising begins because I know you love surprises. I will say you might want to plan a visit to Luke Scott’s compound around December 2040.

--A new Aqua Teen Hunger Force theme song? And they’re going to be called “Aqua Unit Patrol Squad One”?
Josh Homme & Alain Johannes - "Aqua Unit Patrol Squad One Theme" by 1077 The End
Yeah, their theme song is one I would never want changed.

--Raider fan of the week comes to us from Lodi, California. Remember Lodi from Raven’s “flock” in WCW? Yeah, those were the days. Anyway Shawn Batie was at a cemetery at night and apparently disturbing the dead people because police were called out on him. Really this blurb from KCRA.com is all I need to point out: “Police said that Batie was wearing an Oakland Raiders jacket, a g-string and a hair scrunchie around his genitals. He was also wearing socks.”
Well, that’s good. Wouldn’t want him to catch a cold.
Back to WCW, sadly Chris Jericho was booted off Dancing with the Stars this week.
And now for no reason.
Alex Wright.

Das Wunderkind and Disco Inferno were severely underrated.

--Record setting Astro Bill Hall set a club mark for strikeouts during the month of April which would be great if he was a pitcher. 27 times he’s struck out and there’s still a couple of games left so that’s good. As for whose record he broke? None other than Pete Incaviglia.

--You knew it was just a matter of time before you saw someone attempt to make a Ron Swannson turkey burger. You order that bad boy and you have no room for apps or zerts for sure

I’m surprised Epic Meal Time didn’t make this first, but I guess they were busy with the hamburger lasagna.

And of course there’s a TomHaverfoods.com. C’mon Internet this took almost 5 days before it was up.
Biscuits are butter boats.

--Slate had an article on the politics of Parks and Recreation. It is as boring and pointless an article as something can be that includes the name “Ron Swanson.”

--The new Beastie Boys album is out. Hell to the yes.

--Do I want Queen Cersei and Joffrey to die horrible deaths? Yes. Yes I do. Of course I also want a dire wolf, but that ain’t happening anytime soon either.
So far my favorite Thrones characters are the smallest – Arya and Tyrion.

--Of course Law & Order: LA is going to shoot an episode based on Senator Giffords shooting. I mean it’s been like almost five months.

--If you liked Treme’s first season I’m sure you liked the second season premiere. It was more of the same except with a little more focus on the police/crime aspect which means more David Morse. Fine by me. As usual my favorite scenes were the ones with Kim Dickens as she works in a fancy NYC kitchen. I like Anthony Bourdain writing those kitchen scenes. Good stuff. While watching Treme I usually find myself wondering at least three times an episode how much longer is left. It’s just not my cup of tea, but if Kim Dickens is making the tea I’ll probably continue to watch.
I like reading these Treme: Explained pieces by Dave Walker from The Times-Picayune more than I like watching the show.


--How in the hell did I have an iPad for four months before anyone told me about Flipboard? Love how it makes Twitter basically a digital magazine with hyperlinks appearing as blurbs and pics automatically posting.

--Jay Cutler and Kristin Cavallari engaged? Yeah, that’s about right.

--Congratulations to the Braves pitchers who only waited until April 25th to collect their first hit as a unit. Derek Lowe broke the 0 for 38 stretch.

--On the plus side for the Astros is no single player has outhomered Houston as a team. As of Tuesday Ryan Braun and Jose Bautista are four behind the torrid pace set by McLane’s Mashers.

--Anyone else almost strangle the principal on The Killing this week? She said something along the lines of, “If I knew anything else I would have told you.” And then proceeded to suddenly remember the teacher in question happened to have an incident with a girl at another school, but that girl was crazy. Oh and did I mention he married a former student of his? No? Oh well that may be of interest to you as well. But really that’s all I know…I think.

--Have you watched a video of a man urinating on cough drops today? Well it’s not my fault. I like how he tried to fill his prescription afterwards. Smooth.

--If you were building your summer vacation around visiting Flavor Flav’s fried chicken restaurant in Iowa, well I’ve got some bad news. It’s closed after a, presumably, glorious four month run. But don’t worry Flavor is opening up a House of Flavors in the Riviera in Vegas.

--I finally got around to watching Tron: Legacy which has been sitting on my TV stand since the NBA and NHL playoffs started. It was the pretty eye and ear candy I expected. Though evil, unaged Flynn just looked weird to me to the point of distraction. What it did more than anything else was make me want to hit Joystix to play the game.

--Surprise! Carl Everett is crazy. And you may as well pull the trigger if you’re going to smash my iPhone. I lost my phone once and it was the most terrifying night of my life.

--His show is a little uneven, but I imagine his book is going to be really strong. Esquire has an excerpt from Demetri Martin in which he discusses the various eating habits he’s had over the years. “Raw Plus Sushi” intrigues me.

--The only thing missing from the Sleigh Bells concert was Childish Gambino...


Questions, concerns or if your much cooler than you wife swiped the set list from the Sleigh Bells concert…

6 comments:

  1. Alex Wright's completely "hetero" pre/post match dance...a forgettable moment for us all.

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  2. If by "forgettable moment" you mean awesome sauce, then I agree.

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  3. Great read as always man, got 3 tabs in my browser queued up just from links in this post.

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  4. Thanks. I thought you were gonna post your SMD big board on chives gospel.bloodspot.com today?

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  5. Yeah iPad I f'n typed "bloodspot." Idiot.

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  6. You just wanted to reiterate it..."my iPad". I would, at least. And yes! Just posted it up!!

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