Wednesday, February 02, 2011

Walking high and mighty like she's #1 and She thinks she's the passionate one

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--HBO. Aaron Sorkin. Cable News. Looks good on paper.

--The final word on the Taco Bell meat controversy goes to Lewis Black.
The Daily Show With Jon StewartMon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Back in Black - Meat Edition
Daily Show Full EpisodesPolitical Humor & Satire BlogThe Daily Show on Facebook

“The other 12% is our secret.” Good God.

--She might not have taken home an award, but Mila Kunis won the SAGs. had an article or photo gallery titled “Fashion at the SAG Awards.” Underneath that headline this inexplicable sentence, “Sofia Vergara is on worst-dressed list for too much cleavage.”

Uh, okay.

--There’s no appointment television on Sunday nights for me right now…..unless MSNBC is running a marathon of To Catch A Predator episodes. Then it’s on.
This from a guy who didn’t take kindly to Chris Hansen asking him questions, “You know what? I don’t want this cookie. I just want to go to the beach.” The fact that these guys always start chomping on those chocolate chip cookies kills me. Why NBC hasn’t boxed those cookies and sold them under the To Catch A Predator banner is beyond me. I mean no perv EVER resisted those cookies. They must be delicious.
Some of the most incredible, sick yet hilarious lines from TCAP come from the chats.
Some pervs like this one take into consideration the underage girl’s feelings, “Do you wanna make love or f*** for the first time?” I mean that’s a stone cold gentleman right there.
Although it’s not always an underage girls on the other end of the chat, “You won’t tell anyone I’m gay will you?” Reply: “If you won’t tell anyone you blanked my blank.”
Oh those blankety blanks. Hearing those chats voiced on NBC is just all kinds of sickawesome.
Obviously we’re dealing with some mentally disturbed individuals, but special disturbed shout-out to the guy who brought his young son and the guy who had his sister and her kids drive him to the rendezvous house. That particular stud was ready with both barrels of his excuse shotgun. After being grilled by Chris Hansen all he kept repeating, “Hey NBC, I got two words for you: role-playing chat room.” English and math skills, ladies. As he was getting stuffed into the back of a cop car, “Do I look like I need 14-year-old girls? Man, I don’t need 14-year-old girls. I got all kind of girls.” Once again, this from the guy who had his sister and her kids drive him to the supposed underage girl’s house.
The guy who wore a black cowboy hat, red sleeveless shirt unbuttoned with no undershirt on…yeah, I think the cops should have arrested him before he even walked in the door.
And the arrests from the cops in camouflage may be overkill. Maybe.
It rarely gets better than the guy who comes in and starts undressing on command. One particularly sicko wanted the underage girl to not only have relations with him, but her cat as well because, well he doesn’t have to explain himself to you. Chris Hansen delivered this as only Chris Hansen could deliver this, “You’re naked. There’s a 14-year-old girl. You’re chasing a cat around. There’s Cool Whip…”
My favoritest wow belongs to this guy who was busted twice on consecutive days. I mean you think if one night you get busted by a national television crew and exposed as a perverted freak that, oh I don’t know, YOU MIGHT TAKE THE VERY NEXT DAY OFF.

Lighten up Hansen. The guy is hungry, he had a death in the family and he’s seeing a psychiatrist.
To Catch A Predator is gold. Sick, twisted gold.

--Chuck hasn’t had one of its best seasons and I guess we chalk it up to not knowing until late in the game whether it was headed towards 13 episodes and a series finale or what. Turns out we get 11 more episodes, but none of those will have the emotional payoff that this week’s Chuck had. In a word: Awesome.
The proposal was pitch perfect and everything else already had you spinning like the floor waxer that was the soundtrack to the proposal. Just a perfect shot and scene.
Timothy Dalton was the best Chuck villain by far. Linda Hamilton never seemed to click in her role though.

--As someone whose Dungeons and Dragons knowledge is limited to what Freaks and Geeks and Chank spots have taught me I’m not sure I’m gonna like this week’s Community. Then again I haven’t been a huge fan of the last couple of themed episodes anyway besides the Christmas one which was spectacular. But if Greendale is going to offer a Who’s The Boss course then all the better.
Greatest picture from the Community cast ever?

Greatest picture from the Community cast ever.

--Maybe you stayed up for the Rockets and Lakers or maybe, like me, you passed out and avoided another agonizing close but no cigar loss. Kevin Martin went 10 for 11 from the free throw line. The rest of the Rockets went 0 for 0. The last NBA team who had only one player reach the line in a game was the Hornets 7 years ago when former Rocket David Wesley was the only free thrower.

--Friday Night Lights ends its run on next week and I'll likely cry until I can no longer produce tears. Anyway, April 15th NBC starts re-airing this final season. The final season comes out on DVD 10 days earlier which makes sense, you know since NBC is involved.

--Always love what the guys over at come up with. I’m glad to see them get major run this week for their work on the all-encompassing dunk contest video. It is a must-watch, well except for Ralph Sampson’s dunks in 1984.

--It’s not like we’ll never hear from Jack White again, but still the news that he and Meg are no longer going to White Stripe it up sucks. Nice little reflection from Spin’s Chuck Klosterman in an interview published back in 2002.

--Kristen Stewart is passing on playing Lois Lane in the next Superman. Whew.

--A really good, if not depressing, read from Stephanie Stradley on the NFL labor situation. Like most people who aren’t NFL owners I think 18 games is just stupid and short-sighted.

--Lucas, License to Drive, Silver Bullet, Dream A Little Dream, The Lost Boys and that’s not even the classics like Blown Away (hi Nicole Eggert), Fever Lake, Prayer of the Rollerboys and Demolition High AND Demolition University. So why couldn’t Corey Haim get any love in the SAG In Memoriam? Don’t think Corey Feldman didn’t notice.

--Please don’t make us wait six years between albums again Ricky Martin.

--New U2 in May? Out-standing.

--Please Bob McNair just STFU.

--Interesting little piece on that A Tribe Called Quest doc that Michael Rapaport put together.

--Chopped All-Stars?! I’m in, if only to see how Robert Irvine fares and to root against Anne Burrell. Chef Maneet Chauhan you may remember from Next Iron Chef. Geoffrey Zakarian you may remember from Next Food Network Star.

--Damn you DirecTV with your showing Friday Night Lights, Damages and now the 2011 SI Swimsuit Selection Show next week. I don’t even know what that is, but it sounds all kinds of awesome.

--Watching the frantic, intense beauty of Black Swan did not improve my yoga like I was hoping. Anyway, good interview from GQ with Winona Ryder. Loved her in Edward Scissorhands and yet in Black Swan she had scissors in her hands and that didn’t turn out so well.

--Showtime knows how to pique my interest even as it wanes on their other shows…Kristen Bell in a Showtime pilot called House of Lies. I’m in. Don Cheadle also in and even before he was told Kristen Bell would be his love interest.

--You’d think Alabama would allow its national champion cheerleaders to use the school’s “A” logo on their championship rings that the girls are paying out of pocket for. You’d think that, but you’d be wrong.

--The New York Department of Health has been trying to curb the state’s obesity problem with some awesome signs and commercials. This one hates on sugar and I won’t spoil the image that flashes across the screen briefly except to say it probably even grosses Rex Ryan out.

--The U.S. government going after! Now. It’s. Personal.

--Not sure how I feel about a sushi place described as “think Chipotle with sushi.” But if it’s in the tunnels I’m pretty sure I’ll be trying it sometime.

--Congratulations to the Cavaliers who became the first team in NBA history to be first to 40 losses a year after being the first to 40 wins.

--Whatever ReelzChannel is that’s where you will find that Kennedys miniseries that Showtime, Starz and pretty much everyone passed on.

--I have a feeling that the Super Bowl commercials more than the game itself is going to break Twitter. But the only ad I’m interested in will have a code that unlocks a secret level on Angry Birds. Hell yeah. It’ll happen in the 4th quarter during a trailer for some movie called Rio.

--Surprisingly this is not out of Florida, but from Minnesota where Stacey Champion wanted to get a gift for a relative. That gift being a cute little puppy. Only problem being the relative didn’t live close enough to drive to. So really there was only one thing for Stacey left to do. Yep, what all sane people filled with common sense would do. She stuffed the puppy in a box and dropped it off at the post office. And she would’ve gotten away with it to if it wasn’t for that meddling puppy opening its big mouth about the whole thing and now Stacey is in trouble. In her defense she did try to send it 2-day priority.

--If this doesn’t get you ready for the food and football on Sunday then nothing will. Thanks for sending it my way @TeamRacerX. The guys from EpicMealTime with 138,000 calories of goodness.

Questions, comments or if your birthday is this Friday, it could snow and yet you’re still being asked to go into work…


  1. There is just something about Mila Kunis that drives me insane, and by insane i mean that in a great way. She doesnt have the Talents of Sofia Vergara below the neck but damn it shes so cute. As for the Rothlesburger,i now see why you dont eat meat. That was disgusting straight fucking gluttony.

  2. Mila is going to be eternally hot by way of her immortal cuteness.

    When they actually eat that monstrosity it's just WOW

  3. Anonymous9:39 AM

    The comments section of the Chron SAG fahion story is hilarious. Its a few pages of guys telling the chron staff's obviously flat editors to stop being jealous.

  4. Nothing like the Chronicle's comments section but I totally neglected that part for Sofia's story. Fixed. Thanks.

  5. as a former AD&D geek I'm pumped for tonight's Community.


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