Tuesday, June 22, 2010

And Now I'd Like To Introduce what's up? I'll Pass The Mic To D. For A Fist Full Of Truth.

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--How insane was that U.S./Slovenia game last Friday? I’ve seen a lot of people say don’t blame the ref, blame the U.S.’s piss poor first half play. Why can’t we blame both? The U.S. crapped its pants the first 15 minutes and gave up an early goal as usual. The rest of the half they looked uncomfortable running around with loads in their shorts. Thankfully the half came so they could change shorts. Second half was a different story with everything clicking and great finishes from Donovan, Bradley and Edu of which two of those finishes actually counted. Oh well, can’t ask for much more than beat Algeria and you’re in.

--Another strong Party Down this week with the most randomly awesome shout out ever. Did not expect to hear the name of one Cody Carlson. Outstanding. A Deadspin reference to boot. More ejaculate talk than I usually like when I’m eating. I would have assumed that was an RDD (Ron Donald Don’t).
Can’t wait to see Jane Lynch back in the finale this week.

--Lighten up National Pork Board. Firstly there’s no such thing as unicorn (sorry Raheel) meat. Secondly no one was going to confuse your “The Other White Meat” trademark with “Unicorn: The New White Meat.” ThinkGeek.com reacted as well as you can after receiving a cease-and-desist letter stating:
“We’d like to publicly apologize to the N.P.B. for the confusion over unicorn and pork — and for their awkward extended pause on the phone after we had explained our unicorn meat doesn’t actually exist.”

--Finally caught up on True Blood and was pretty bored anytime we weren’t dealing with Eric/Bill/Sookeh. So awesome when Sookie said she expected Bill to come in anytime and say “Sookeh.” Early on though it looks like too many storylines in play.
How much longer until we can kill off Tara and her mother? Seriously I can’t deal with another season like last from those two. If there’s a more annoying character than Tara on television I don’t know who it’d be (oh wait E from Entourage). Worst of all she brings down Lafayette.
I like Sam, but his family reunion needs to wrap up quickly.
Always liked Andy and Jason, but they’re not clicking yet or maybe it’s because I don’t think anyone in that town not named Tara gives a F exactly who shot Eggs.
I think Evan Rachel Wood should play Kristin Bauer von Straten’s character, Pam,and vice versa. Kristin has always been strong and seems to display more characteristics you’d think The Queen would have than Evan Rachel Wood does. Although she was pretty strong when she shut Eric up in the first episode.
I did like the dinner Bill had that included cruelty-free blood and blood bisque with flower petals.
Oh and big shock the show was already given a fourth season.

--So the Rockets are eyeing Demarcus Cousins, eh? Works for me in a big way. Let’s see if Morey can make it happen and if so what he’ll give up. Or if he doesn’t and Detroit or someone else swoops in what all that team gives up. Should be an interesting Thursday night.

--I’m sure one day I’ll watch the Treme finale or I won’t. One of those. I did, however, read Alan Sepinwall's interview with David Simon in which he sounds like a guy who is tired of hearing that Treme doesn’t have a plot and is nowhere close to as good as The Wire or Generation Kill.

--Remember that convicted killer in Utah who wanted to be executed via firing squad? Yeah, he got his wish last week. Although pinning a target on his chest seems a little odd. Umm, aim for the heart not a good enough instruction?

--Eric Roberts didn’t want to be left out of the fun so he’s going to Young and the Restless.

--Zack Morris/Mark-Paul Gosselaar on Weeds next season?! I really hopes Weeds can return to its glory and then end itself properly.

Best Fallon moment yet.

--Like pretty pictures of pretty food? You gotta check out Alison Cook’s photos from her 4-hour lunch at the newly ranked #1 restaurant in the world, Noma. Some insane presentations.

--Baseball players need to stop screwing with J.R. Richard’s records. First we have Stephen Strasburg taking these strikeout marks from J.R. Now Josh Johnson is getting in on it. The Marlin has now gone 8 straight games working at least 6 innings while not allowing more than a single run. J.R. Richard was the last pitcher to put a string like that together and he did that in 1979. Richard also did that as part of a stretch of 9 straight complete games. Ridiculous. Almost as ridiculous as Bruce Sutter winning the Cy Young Award over Joe Niekro and J.R. Richard.

I mean really? Did something really weird happen that season because here’s what I see. Sutter closed for a Cubs team that finished below .500 while J.R. and Joe pitched for an Astros team that finished 1.5 games out of first. Sutter saved 37 games which led the league, but it’s not like he set a record. 6-6 with a 2.22 ERA is okay for a reliever and 110 Ks in just over 103 IP is strong. Also strong is a major league-leading 313 freakin’ strikeouts in 292.1 innings to go with an 18-13 record and a league-leading 2.71 ERA. J.R. also had the best H/9, K/9 and K/BB ratio and was 2nd in shutouts and complete games with a mind-boggling 19 of the latter. And like I said the Astros were actually good while the Cubs were the Cubs. Joe led the league in wins (21) and shutouts (5), but none of his other numbers come close to J.R. who should have been the winner of the 1979 Cy Young Award.

--I can probably go the rest of my life without seeing or hearing Miley Cyrus and Bret Michaels duet “Every Rose Has Its Thorn.”

--Congratulations to Rachel Bilson for finally wising up and kicking Hayden Christensen to the curb. Well almost, they’re taking a month off. Finish him Rachel!

--What I didn’t understand most after watching Top Chef last week was how the hell Real Housewives of New York had a reunion show that had reached three parts?! How many parts can you have to a freakin’ reunion show before it’s just a whole other season?!

--Watching The U.S. Open made me feel a lot better about the hacking I’m about to do in Show Me Your Tents on Wednesday.

--Got around to watching Shutter Island which was aight though about 30 minutes or so too long. Not Scorsese or Dicaprio’s best work and their worst collaboration, but it made me laugh so it’s all good. It was a comedy right?

--Two words you never want to see together: counterfeit condoms. Apparently there was a big bust of a counterfeit condom ring in New York recently and it’s big business in China as well. In New York half a million condoms passed off as Trojans didn’t have spermicide as advertised and failed water leakage tests. The fake condoms in China were lubricated with vegetable oil. Yeah, that might be a problem.

--Esquire says Brooklyn Decker is the sexiest woman alive and who am I to disagree?

--Love me some Leonard Cohen so word of him working on a new album is good word.

--I’m going to miss Dzintra’s insanity on Food Network Star plus she’s from Austin so we lose a Texan on the show. Hilarious when she “sshhed” Aria.

--You knew a minor league baseball team was going to get in on the LeBron free agency stuff. The Lake County Captains is an affiliate of Cleveland or maybe the other way around considering the Indians these days. Anyway they’re having a “Stay LeBron” night on the first day of free agency. They’re renaming themselves LeLake LeCounty LeCaptains. Gotta love minor league baseball.

--Because I’m slow I’m just now finding out Katey Sagal is married to Sons of Anarchy creator Kurt Sutter.

--Since sports cards are only growing in popularity it makes sense the WNBA has its own set. It also makes sense to only charge what the market can bear. So how the fu** did the WNBA come to the conclusion $84 is a price people would be willing to pay for its 2010 set?

--There’s a Michael Jackson & Bubbles: The Untold Story on Animal Planet?!

--Because this is true change that’s needed: American Idol lowering age minimum to 15.

--We finally have a date on Kenny Powers’ return to the mound. September 26th. That’ll mark the next time I actually watch baseball.

Yes please.

--Chris Klein going to rehab?! But his career hasn’t been this hot since American Pie? Obviously everyone knows he should have been in Mamma Mia and I’m pretty sure Facebook groups are trying to get him on Glee.

--Josh Koscheck and Holly Madison?!

--Congratulations to Court McGee on becoming the next Ultimate Fighter. The guy lived one helluva hard life that included being legally dead before turning his life around. And to win this competition after starting out as an after-thought, well, great stuff. Weird season of TUF with all the injuries, Tito’s firing, lack of multiple alcoholics and did I mention injuries?
Good night of fights all around and holy crap how about Chris Leben’s 2nd round destruction of the previously undefeated Aaron Simpson?
Is there a better 1st round fighter than Jamie Yager? Too bad fights sometimes last longer than five minutes.

--Wanna see Helen Mirren nekkid?

--Oh Harold & Kumar will you two ever stop making movies? Numero tres started shooting and it’ll include Patton Oswalt. That allows me to remind you to check out Big Fan which I believe is still on Watch Instantly. A good portion of sports talk callers are summed up in Patton Oswalt’s character who hates the Cowboys, but really hates the Eagles. And hey, it’s got Michael Rappaport.

--Acting is quitting Amanda Bynes or vice versa.

--If you're so inclined (and you should be) this is the week Stephen Colbert is airing the segments from his astronaut training here in Houston.

--Can we please put a moratorium on Lady Gaga?

--Family of the Week comes to us from Florida. May I present the Eckards. 19-year-old Sean disappeared Friday. Saturday at 3AM Momma Eckard saw her 21-year-old son Stanley in her yard burying something. What? Stanley told Moms he was burying some of his old girlfriend’s belongings. Apparently Sister Eckard is the only logical Eckard and she told her dad to find out what Stanley really buried. Probably not easy for a father to dig up a son, but that’s what happened. Stanley admitted to strangling his brother and burying him with the intent of moving the body in a couple of weeks when his parents were going out of town. This would have been an awesome Family Ties.

--Over by Warehouse Live and across from my go-to Vietnamese restaurant, Huynh, sits the Oh My Pocket Pies truck every weekday. That’s where we’re shooting this Food Network Canada thing with Brian Boitano (maybe? no? okay). I finally made it out there with veggie pot pie on the brain, sadly no more veggies by the time I got there so I went with the pie of the month, margherita, and the twice baked potato pie which had veggie bacon bits. Oh hell yeah. The margherita didn’t need the ranch or sriracha dipping sauces, but they both complimented the twice baked potato pie. Damn good stuff. I like hitting this place and Melange Creperie for lunch. I just don’t like going back to the office dripping with sweat. How many more days of summer? It just started Monday? Crap.

--I’m not a big Ohio State fan, but I’ll never question the toughness of Buckeye recruit Jamel Turner. The 18-year-old appears to be stuck in Final Destination. He was shot in a drive-by back in April and over the weekend he was shot multiple times leaving him in critical condition. He was inside a house when someone shot it up. A girl was inside with him and sadly she was killed.

--I’m not sure who Jake and Vienna are, but apparently they broke up.

--RIP Manute Bol.

Questions, comments or if you are indeed El Chico del Apartamento 512…


  1. That food looks great but I'm not nearly sophisticated enough to eat 90% of it.

    Can we send Tara, E and Skylar White to face a Utah firing squad?

    Yes of course I wanted to see Helen Mirren nude. Don't forget to forward that link to Granato. I'm sure he'll appreciate it.

    Did you notice on the broadcast they only mentioned Yager's knockouts and nothing about him being a big quitter puss.

  2. Same here on the food at Noma. That would intimidate the hell out of me.
    I'm not as big a Skyler hater as most Breaking Bad'ers I know.
    Yeah, I noticed they didn't mention a thing about Yager quitting like he did. Guy is a helluva athlete, but as a mixed martial artist, well, he's a helluva athlete.

  3. Barry (bcstagg)5:13 PM

    I've been calling for Tara's death for 20 episodes now! She literally adds nothing to the show. I'm a little upset it's all werewolfy - twilghty. I have friends who have read the books (reading is for chumps) and they say Tara doesn't have a big part at all. Someone really screwed up in deciding to balloon up her part. I'm also really surprised you didn't mention the Snoop Dogg tribute to Sookie. That was the best part of the episode, sadly.

  4. Agree with you on the werewolves, but hell after shapeshifters and menauds (sp?) they can throw in anything they want as long as they keep it campy fun and I don't have to use my brain. Tara was good in 1st season in small doses and I guess they thought they had something. Whoops. Snoop and Sookie was pretty funny.

  5. I have the books but haven't been able to get past the first 20 pages.

    I wouldn't be opposed to Weeds new season starting with Nancy in front of a firing squad. They could fill the rest of the season with Nancy's nude greatest hits.

  6. Hilarious and the best way to recapture the audience that has left it through the years.

  7. Barry (bcstagg)6:30 PM

    I feel like there was a discussion in the "Weeds War Room" and they decided to change it's identity. Make it a drama with a lot of interesting characters rather than that fun and bright and slightly dark comedy. The lack of Conrad and Haylia is no good for the show. I mean the mayor of Tijuana? Really? Has 24 syndrome. Used to be extremely believable and therefore people could identify with it, but now it's very unrealistic.

  8. Pretty much. Had a bad feeling once Conrad was out of the situation.

  9. You guys need to have Misha on the show to talk about that lunch at Noma, his other food travels and being a twitter assassin. It'd be good radio.

  10. Two escobars is by far the best 30 for 30 Documentary! I DVR'd it and started watching it around 11:00 Pm then i realized that shit was 2 hours long but didnt stop watching even though i only got 4 hours of sleep well worth it though. What are your thoughts on it?

  11. I'll put more up later this week but that was easily the best 30 for 30.


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