You're Scheming On A Thing That's A Mirage. I'm Trying To Tell You Now It's Sabotage.

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--It was going to be hard to top the face-off and staredown between Diego Sanchez and Clay Guida, but three rounds later and we have ourselves the Fight of the Year. I’m not sure if there is anyone or anything in this world that can knock Clay Guida out. How he survived that onslaught in the first round is beyond me. Great card up and down, but how could it not be when you lead off with Joe Stevenson and Nate Diaz?

--Leighton Meester sex tape?! She does what with her feet?!

--I hope you're ready for a Warm Fuzzy...A couple of weekends ago 12-year-old Daquan Sales was killed in an apparent hit-and-run. Thankfully they caught the bastard driver. Anyway, the kid was signed up to attend Daequan Cook's summer basketball camp. Daequan reads in the paper about this boy and how he idolized Daequan. Daequan contacted the family and offered to help with the funeral costs. He is also going to donate a yearly scholarship to his camp in the boy's name. Cook also invited any of the boy's family to attend his camp for free. Nicely done, Daequan.

--HBO's Bored To Death, I'm gonna go ahead and label must-record television. How can you go wrong with Jason Schwarzman, Zach Galif-howeveryoufinishit, Parker Posey, Ted Danson and Kristen Wiig?

--I suppose I'm stupid for not knowing Sookie and Bill have been dating in real-life (whatever that is) for two years.

Lafayette the vampire is promising.

--Our D-bag of the week comes to us from California. Alfred J. Ravas is a piece of crap. He's an attorney who deserves bad things to happen to him. You may have heard about the guy who sued the A's for not giving him a commemorative sun hat as part of a Mother's Day promotion. That guy is this d-bag who claimed gender discrimination because he didn't get a plaid sun hat. Really Mr. D-bag?! The A's decided to settle out of court and agreed to a $510,000 payout to Ravas. Awesome legal system strikes again.

--OUr Multitasking Person of the Week is Blair O'Neal who is a model, a quarterback in the Lingerie Football League, golfer and maybe a reality show winner. She's in the finals next Monday on Big Break.


--Manny flew in a middle seat on Southwest because he didn't check in until late? Classic.

--Perez Hilton punched in the face and a nation mourns...or laughs hysterically...one of those...probably the latter.

--I'm kinda looking forward to this (smothers girlish squeals under layers of sadness)...

--Is there anything more money than a Triumph segment on Conan? (Hint: no) Is there a better TV site than Warming Glow? (Hint: no)

--Whoa, whoa, whoa Eko wants to return to Lost to give Eko some closure?! Make it happen boys. Less time on Top Chef: Masters and more time on Eko.

--Damn, World Champion Phillies. Brad Lidge was on the DL and you still went 1-8 on a homestand?!

--Pirate Andrew McCutcheon hit triples in three straight games becoming the first rookie to do that since? Anyone? Anyone? Luke Scott, looking for Luke Scott.

--There’s lucky and then there’s the U.S. needing at least a 3-goal victory and Brazil needing at least a 3-goal victory for the U.S. to advance in the Confederations Cup.

--The studio pulled the plug on Moneyball?! I wouldn't have actually ever put the plug in, but you can't be teasing Demetri Martin as Paul DePodesta and not deliver.

--Last week I found out Ben from Lost is married to Arlene from True Blood. This week it’s Ben’s daughter, Alex from Lost is dating Jeff, no this can’t be right, Goldblum?! Nice little 35 year difference there. But if your father was Ben you'd probably have some issues too.

--I’m not sure what Honey Magazine is, but I am sure Vernon Davis has nothing in common with Mike Singletary.
When you're going out without the help of a stylist, how long does it take you to get dressed?
It takes me around an hour because I have to make sure what I have on really reflects my personal style, and then it has to be perfect, or close to it.
When is a murse appropriate? Do you carry one?
Yes, I carry one only when I am going to the beach, pool party or outdoor event.

Questions, comments or if all you did was hit a f'n curb on your way to work and you're car-less for two f'n weeks...