Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Most illingest b-boy - I got that feeling

No Need To Rehash The Beatdown, What With The Boondocks Premiering on Monday. That's The Important Thing...

--Texans 28th in rushing yards allowed per carry at 4.8. Broncos and Raiders the only teams allowing more than 5 yards a pop. Texans also 28th in getting off the field on 3rd down allowing conversions just more than 47% of the time. Colts are actually worse than that.

--Houston is a top 10 offense (10th) despite being 29th in rushing yards per game. It is 6th in passing yards per, tied with the Colts.

--The bad news is the Texans are 29th in red zone TD percentage scoring TDs on just 6 of 20 such possessions. The worse news is the Titans are # 1 in keeping red zone possessions out of their end zone.

--The Vikings have still yet to allow a rushing score and longest run against was just 17 yards. Minnesota 1st against the run, dead last against the pass.

--No surprise the top two teams in the league in turnover ratio are the top two teams in the league. Patriots and Colts both +7. Saints -9 no one else worse than -5.

--Congratulations to Monday Night Football for announcing that Jimmy Kimmel will never be invited on the show again after he came on this past Monday and made viewers laugh. What was he thinking? Seriously MNF you put idiot after idiot on last year and Jimmy comes on makes a crack about Joe Theismann watching at home with steam coming out of his ears and that gets Jimmy booted? Why not ban whoever the hell sets up the MNF schedule? Yay the Falcons are on! Yay the Bills! Just wait kiddies we’ll eventually be getting the Niners and Seahawks, the Dolphins make an appearance and yay Saints/Falcons!

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--Colbert ’08 – Don’t F&*# This Up America

--How much fun is it watching Juan Diaz break his opponent’s spirit and will in the ring? Juan and Manny would be a whole hell of a lotta fun, which means it won’t happen.

--Okay Friday Night Lights we get it, Landry and Tyra are great actors, but did we really need justifiable homicide to allow them to show off?

--Katie Couric and Hank Goldberg once dated?!

--Like McAdams loves Gosling…Gosling…Gosling…wait they’re done?!

--Ummm, why, how, and why again did Atlanta get “awarded” a WNBA franchise?! That still exists? It’s been a bad offseason Mr. Stern, so why not do something positive and fold that bad boy or girl up already?

--Guess who’s back, back again, BradyFan83’s back with a friend…

--So annoying, so so annoying and yet we finally get a laugh out of Dane Cook…

--Common as The Green Lantern in the upcoming Justice League movie?!

--Damages if f’n awesome! If they somehow come up with a storyline for a second season you shouldn’t miss it.

--The British version is better, but Kitchen Nightmares has already been picked up for another season by Fox.

--Leon continues to kill on Curb. Easily the best scene on HBO this year…not counting anything from Conchords, of course…

--There’s a Madden Espanol version?! By the way, FIFA ’08 is the newest in video crack.

--Police impersonators we’ve seen, but Park Ranger impersonators?! That was the case in Indianapolis at some park where two sicko guys drove around in a white Ford Crown Victoria with a portable red siren on the top of it. These pieces of crap harassed six boys giving them…oh dear God…drug tests. Yep, these sorry excuses for human beings ordered the boys to pull down their pants and pee in cups. Six boys will have nightmares for a long time. The sickos are still out there.

To get that last story out of our head...
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--Most depressing site you will ever visit Yeah, don’t need a death date right next to a cute puppy profile although kids may use this to guilt their parents to give them a dog. Note to Ellen: do not, do NOT go to

--Gatorade Tiger?! What took so long? Gatorade gum (or whatever they call it now) is very strong!

--Let’s go to Miami for some entertainment. Back in 1995 when TLC and Boyz II Men dominated the charts Bernice Heslop opened up her paper and saw the winning numbers she had on her lotto ticket. She immediately called her kids and told them about the $28.5 million coming her way. She didn’t call her husband seeing as how they had lived a part for the last five years. So she put the ticket in a safe deposit box and called her lawyer to get a quickie divorce. Divorce done and ex-husband didn’t find out about it for two years. That is until Marvel Rodriguez got involved. The guy overheard this story about the woman winning the lotto, getting the divorce and the husband becoming none the wiser. Marvel used the investigative skills he picked up as a bouncer and found ex-husband and told him his ex-wife was RICH BIATCH. Marvel got ex-husband to sign a contract giving Marvel 35% of anything he got from ex-wife. Long story short ex-wife paid ex-husband $300,000 lump sum and $57,000 annually and Marvel and ex-husband are in court over the contract.

--Seriously Floyd, you lost to Mark Cuban on Dancing.
Questions, comments or if you can’t get this outta your head..…Should you (A) take the time to find a condom, (B) you walk right over and you pound her, (C) tell her that you want her love, well the answer is (D) all of the above…

1 comment:

  1. hey check the chron video tomorrow on 45 sec with Kasey Studdard.


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