Tuesday, January 02, 2007

The Sun is Beating Down on My Baseball Hat

Worst 6-10 Ever…

I’m not good at math, but I know 6 wins is more than 2 wins, but watching the way those 6 wins came about it’s barely more impressive. I’m not going to sit here and dog the team because that’s what the regular season and first round pick is for. I will say that if this team brings back David Carr then it better be prepared for a fan firestorm that will rival and maybe surpass the Vince/Reggie debacle. It wasn’t all bad this season there was the struck it rich pick of DeMeco Ryans, the two rookie tackles may end up working out, Anthony Weaver might be the best free agent acquisition in Houston’s brief history, the Christmas Miracle, getting swept by Vince and the Tita…oh wait, stay positive, ummm, Andre Johnson had a helluva half a season, the short passing game has been nearly perfected, they won a game with -5 yards passing and I’m sure there are other highlights including that Browns win, but I stopped watching after I saw the Texans run a draw on 3rd and 13 in the first drive of the game in the last game of the season. My New Year’s wish for the Texans: Somehow, someway get Boise State head coach Chris Peterson as offensive coordinator or hell, head coach is fine with me.

--Domanick Davis is now Domanick Williams and his number is now 31 and he didn't watch one single Texans game. Sounds promising.

--Andre Johnson was the only receiver to go over 100 catches. Who finished second to him in that category? Not Marvin Harrison, not Torry Holt, but none other than Detroit’s Mike Furrey. Furrey had 98 catches. Roy Williams, Mike Williams and Charles Rogers combined had 96.

--For the first time all season I didn’t have to work so I got to watch the games at a watering hole. Like 90% of the people there I wanted to see Vince win and head to the postseason on a 7-game winning streak. It didn’t happen because the Titans were playing the worst possible team in that situation, the Patriots. Those guys come to play every week and even though they were locked into a seed their starters were playing 3 and a half quarters. I’m sure Vince will be knocking on the postseason door again next season. You know Bud, if you need a solid back up to Vince there’s this guy named David Carr that we looooove here in Houston. Sure would hate to lose Carr to you, that would be so unfortunate for Tennessee to have two of Houston’s favorite sons. Hope that doesn’t happen.

--The Cardinals have had nine straight coaches end their tenures with losing records.

--Matt Millen is officially returning, what with the team being so improved as to pick number 2 next year. Detroit now 24-72 during Millen’s watch.

--Wayne Huizenga should just fire Nick Saban’s flip-flopping self.

--Chad Johnson beat out Marvin Harrison for most receiving yards by three whole yards.

--Hard to believe that was LaDainian’s first rushing title.

--Maurice Jones-Drew ended the season with TDs in eight straight games.

--Drew Bledsoe probably doesn’t have a blog, but tonyhomo.com is rather amusing. By the way, Daddy Joe Simpson basically began the Romo/Jessica thing to get game tickets from the QB. Real classy Joe. Pimp your daughter out to get tickets to a game in Arizona. I’m thinking tickets in Arizona are kind of easy to come by.

How About the Size of the Baked Potatoes on that Coach?

I’m still not sure I saw what I think I saw because what I thought I saw I didn’t think I’d ever see. Boise State had an 18-point lead on Oklahoma about midway through the third quarter. Then three seconds into the 4th quarter that was down to an 8-point lead. Then with 2:27 to go Paul Thompson had four straight completions and after a pass interference he tossed a TD to put OU within 2. Then another Boise State pass interference put OU at the 1 yard line and then the Sooners were penalized for an illegal shift to back them up to the 6 where they still converted from to tie things up. Then things got really crazy. The Broncos had 1:02 left and the ball at their 25 and those guys have no idea what it’s like to take your foot off the gas. Jared Zabransky dropped back and threw what had to be, should have been a game-clinching interception that was returned for 6. But in this fairy tale Jared came right back and threw a 36-yard completion to set up the Broncos at the OU 42. Then he was sacked at the 50 with :30 left and surely that was it. Nope, just a ho-hum hook and lateral for a Boise State TD. Wow. OU with the ball first in overtime and Adrian Peterson ripped off a TD on its first play. Boise State got it down to 4th and 2 at the 6-yard line and so, as you might expect, it put its fate into the hands are right arm of…the tailback?! Zabransky went in motion to the left and RB Vinny Perretta took the shotgun snap, rolled right and found the TE for 6 in the back of the end zone. Incredible, well let’s see what happens in the 2nd overt…what the @%^?! Are they going for two? So Zabransky has three receivers bunched to his left and of course, the statue of liberty is in order and absolutely sold by RB Ian Johnson who runs in for the win. Once everyone stops jumping around and yelling Chris Myers interviews Ian Johnson and Chris being the smooth guy he is ruins the surprise Ian has for his girlfriend cheerleader because he didn’t think Ian was actually going to propose marriage right there on the field. He did, she accepted and basically nine months from now there is going to be one incredible baby explosion in Boise, Idaho. I hate that the national championship game is still days away, but how can it or anything top what we saw on New Year’s night?

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--Steve Francis has left the Knicks to come back to Houston to get rehad his knee, which has severe tendinitis. Apparently a medical retirement or buyout could be in the offing.

--Britney Spears was seen kissing on Matt Leinart last Friday?! First Paris, now Britney, c’mon Matt you are much better than that. Probably should have made it work with Kristin Cavalleri.

--A the Ritz-Carlton in Sarasota your dog can get a massage for the low price of $130. For another $220 your doggie can get a nail buffing, organic beef stew, designer water, gourmet dog biscuits and a bunch of other crap.

--I haven’t seen the new Bond yet, but I did see Daniel Craig in Layer Cake and that was outstanding. Sienna Miller has never looked better.

--In almost a third of all pedestrian related deaths (122 total) last year in South Carolina the official cause was listed as “lying illegally in road.”

--Kate Bosworth turned 24 on Tuesday and now weighs less than she did at birth.

--January 14th is one fantastic night to break open a couple of bottles of cabernet and watch the season premieres of 24, Extras, and Rome. In celebration, a bit of Extras with Ricky looking to sell Patrick Stewart on a script. “I’ve seen everything.”

--Indiana Jones 4 to be released in May ’08?! About the same time as Speed Racer.

--Justin and Cameron done?! I guess he finally saw her without makeup.

--First there were the pics of Jessica Biel tossing around a football on a beach and now Jessica Alba?! What a country! Now if we can just get Tara Reid to stop walking around in a bikini we’ll be set.

--The first candidate for 2007 Mother of the Year comes to us from Indianapolis. It’s there we find Mommy Dyer. First a handful of drivers, a big rig driver and eventually a cop found 3-year-old Damon Dyer running around playing…on Interstate 465. Thankfully the cop showed up in time to prevent toddler road kill. The cop took the boy home and of course Mommy Dyer wasn’t aware her son was even gone. One charge of child neglect for that and one more charge seeing as another child was eating spaghetti off the floor. In all fairness the walls were covered with feces so the floor might have been the cleanest spot in the apartment.

--You’ve probably heard the true story about the M.I.T. kids who raked in million in Vegas by counting cards before Vegas found out. Anyway, the book Bringing Down the House is being made into a movie produced by Kevin Spacey. Hiro from Heroes is in talks to be in it and that’s a very good thing.

--This first line from the Chicago Sun-Times tells the story…”A 21-year-old woman was hospitalized for intoxication over the weekend after "continually providing wrong answers" during a game of Trivial Pursuit where participants drank alcohol and did drugs when they answered incorrectly.” Would you not watch Jeopardy more often if this was how it worked?

--RIP Darrent Williams.

Questions, comments or if you’ve ever used an entire box of powdered sugar, two sticks of butter, a box of cream cheese, and a box of yellow cake mix because Paula Deen told you to…

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