Friday, January 12, 2007

Lookin for a girl, I ran into a guy

These Guys Are Good

The Rockets are now 7-2 without Yao and have hit a high water mark of 10 games over .500. It’s incredible to watch what Juwan Howard and Dikembe Mutombo Mpolondo Mukamba Jean Jacque Wamutombo are doing on a nightly basis and oh yeah, Tracy McGrady has been pretty good although apparently he can be held to under 10 points and the boys still have enough to beat a team like the Lakers. Let’s list all the players in January who are averaging more rebounds a game than Deke…That didn’t take long. He and the beast known as Dwight Howard are averaging 15.8. Tracy is third in scoring over the last 10 games averaging 27.8 the same as Kobe and just more than Dwyane Wade. Houston is now 4th best in point differential because it leads the league in field goal percentage against and points against. What I’m saying is these guys aren’t just going to keep their heads above water while Yao is out, they’re going to secure themselves a playoff spot before he comes back.

Gat R Done

Rarely if ever do I make accurate predictions. So anytime over the last 40 days anyone asked me about the game and I said Florida, if for no other reason than it’s the best team from the best conference, I was told Ohio State this and Big 10 that. Pfft..whatever. Eat it Buckeyes, eat it Big 10, and most of the media can eat it too. It wasn’t all that difficult to figure out which team was going to win. It just took four quarters for the reasons to show themselves. No use delving into it any further, but another congratulations to Chris Leak for displaying so much class after four years of getting dogged by his own fans and getting pulled his senior year anytime his offense got close to the end zone and finishing things with a championship.


I’ll take the Saints over the Eagles in what should be for the NFC title. Bears beat the Seahawks. I’m an idiot and I believe the Colts will beat the Ravens. The Chargers will handle the Patriots.

--How many times in postseason history has the last play of the game been a game winning field goal (I refuse to call them walk-off field goals)? When David Akers did it, it was for just the third time ever.

--Willis McGahee is facing his third paternity suit in the last two years?!

--Who’s having the worst week ever besides Chyna? Gotta be Rice. Smooth move Todd Graham. You too Major.

--This century only the Texans, Cardinals, Bills and Lions haven’t made the playoffs.

--What the hell got into Jabar Gaffney?

--Best news from the NFL this week: Bengals LB David Pollack could play next season. He fractured a C-6 vertebra back in September.

--Boomer Esiason was awful on the television side of Monday Night Football, he’s much better on the radio side and this is his best line in years on Eli Manning, "Manning is playing quarterback like Britney Spears is playing Mommy. Very erratic and without confidence."

--Whoa, whoa, whoa…Sean Salisbury’s one-week suspension was because he took pictures of, well let’s say Salisbury Jr., on his cell and showed them to women?!

--So I’m browsing the auction items at the Bear Bryant College Football Coach of the Year Dinner and of course, the most expensive item is an autographed Vince Young jersey and of course, you can have Mario Williams’ for $600 less. Cross your fingers I get the Temple football helmet for $12 or the Dartmouth helmet for $57. Anyway there are some $25 gift certificates to Pappas and they’re going for more than $25. I know it’s all for charity, but paying $50 for $25 worth of food doesn’t make much sense to me.

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--Mark your calendars…Borat comes out on DVD March 6th.

--Damn you Annika Sorenstam!! And damn you Tiger for making her so good on your video crack of a game!!

--Another mark your calendars and this of the highest importance January 18th Stephen Colbert goes on The O’Reilly Factor and Papa Bear does The Colbert Report.

--Thanks to i-control yanking season 1 of Weeds off before I could finish I had a six month break between episodes 4 and the rest that I’ve finally watched thanks to Santa. What a fantastic freakin’ show! Best thing I’ve seen on Showtime since Red Shoe Diaries jumped the shark (which was as soon as I saw David Duchovny).
Apparently these two are or were dating.

--If you see one anime Simpsons work of art this week make it this one.

--Sunday! Sunday! Sunday!!!!! Premieres of 24, Rome, and Extras!!!!

--Because even double-crossing Jedi Knights can be jerks sometime…

--Dwight’s not really leaving, is he?

--Some people are not only talented and blessed, but actually get “it”. Edward Norton, "A lot of us have talked to the Academy Awards producers about this and I think they're actually going to scuttle the gift baskets and that kind of stuff. I mean the gift baskets, worth amounts of money that a low income family could live on for a year, (are given to) people who have so much already. It gets depressing."
What a roll he went on with Primal Fear, Rounders, and American History X.

--I won’t watch a second, but the best thing about The Apprentice will be Ivanka. Apparently that Grease reality audition show preceding the season premiere of The Apprentice drew better rating than The Donald. Ouch. The Rosie and Trump tiff is about to reach the saturation point.

--Oh young love...for example Bay City, Michigan…It was there that a 17-year-old boy and his girlfriend got into a lover’s quarrel at a party. She left without giving him a goodnight kiss so he went looking for her to get his kiss. He thought he found her car. He thought wrong. He rammed this other girl’s car’s rear bumper not once, not twice, but 15 times. Dude even pushed it through stop signs at intersections. Yeah, the police chased him down and let him know he made an honest mistake and they understood and he could leave now, but just be more careful…that or he got charged with assault with a vehicle, fleeing police, and drunk driving. One of those.

--Drudge Report headline of the week: “Killer Bees Found Near New Orleans.”
Don’t worry I’m sure our fair city will take those killer bees off your hands.

--I wonder if The People’s Choice Awards were worth watching. Let’s see Funniest Male Star went to Robin Williams. Guess not.

--Brooke Burke and David Charvet (Baywatch) didn’t just name their baby Heaven Rain.

--John Cusack and Jeremy Piven have broken up. They'll always have...

--Sophia Bush or Jessica Biel as Wonder Woman.
Decisions, decisions

--You’ve reached “kind of a big deal” status when GMC Denali names a color after you as in a Jay-Z-Blue SUV.

--I doubt I’ll see Factory Girl, but if anyone can pull off Andy Warhol it has to be Guy Pearce. If anyone can pull off Bob Dylan…I mean Billy Quinn it has to be Hayden Christenson…or maybe not.

--Your Extreme update…I saw one of the guys on Top Chef (it's coming down to Sam and Marcel) at a dinner party hosted by Entourage’s Debi Mazar. The other guy, Gary Cherone got dissed by the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. It selected Van Halen for entry with both David Lee Roth and Sammy Hagar getting invites, but not VH’s third singer Mr. Cherone.

--19-year-old Evan Rachel Wood and 38-year-old Marilyn Manson?!
Probably want to stay away from this if you have a daughter.

--15 years ago this week Vanilla Ice’s “To the Extreme” went multi-platinum. Now he’s wrecking shop on Surreal Life Fame Games.
Go Ninja! Go Ninja! Go!
--SMU is in the lead for W. Bush’s Presidential Library. Congratulations?

--The Dodgers are turning their right field pavilion into an all-you-can-eat section because let’s face it America is just too skinny. For $40 on gameday you get all the hot dogs, popcorn, peanuts, nachos and cokes you can consume.

--This is just one of the many reasons attorneys are so great…In Dallas a male high school teacher was supporting his school by attending its girls’ wrestling matches. A coach became suspicious of him because the teacher taped two full hours and focused/zoomed in on the crotch areas of these underage females. So he was charged under the peeping tom law. His attorney Scott Palmer, "How do you draw the line? If you go to a Cowboys game and take a close-up shot of their cleavage, are you committing the same offense because you think that has sex appeal?" Yes, where to draw the line indeed. Because surely taking pictures of professional, mature female cheerleaders who are there to be ogled is the exact same thing as videotaping and zooming in on the crotch areas of high school girls for two full hours.

--If you’re scoring at home it’s rehab trip number two for Verne Troyer. So is he wearing those sun glasses in that Geico spot to try and hide the fact his eyes are glued on a cue card?

--Apparently the former Miss Nevada Katie Rees is wising up and actually going to get paid for acting like a bisexual slut. She’s in talks to do a spread in Playboy

Questions, comments or if the thought of being paid in two-dollar bills actually appeals to you…

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