Saturday, May 21, 2011

Slow riding, gun hidin' on the go. I'm fly like an eagle and I drink Old Crow.

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--Nobody hits more comedy home runs to me than Community. Occasionally it’ll put up a single or reached on error (Astros?) episode. Parks and Recreation has rarely hit less than a double all season. “The Bubble” was another solid extra-base hit, while “Li’l Sebastien” went yard because that’s how Li’l Sebastien rolls.

First we got to see some more of the infamous 4th floor. A place where apparently Tom Haverford’s charm ray is rendered useless. Also a place where Andy can pick up a phone and tell Wall Street to “buy more stocks…now.”
Chris – “Let your brain unlock the door to your heart’s future.”
And that is still in use today…by him…
Li’l Sebastien’s death was a shock to us all and it’s on that President Palmer assassination scale of TV deaths I’ll never forget where I was when I found out. Although it’s not hard to remember those moments because, you know, I was in front of my TV. Predictably Ron took the death hard and if you’re not talking about a horse funeral with reverence you best make sure Ron Swanson isn’t within earshot. Looking at you Ben.
Ron – “Half-mast is too high. Show some damn respect!”
I’m a Jean (your eyes are about to piss tears) Ralphio mark so having him and Tom set up Entertainment 720 was perfect. The funeral wasn’t, but that led us to Ron’s best line, “If you know one thing about me, it would be that I prefer laying wreaths to lighting torches.”
Detlef Schrempf is currently in my top five comedians list.

Line of the Week goes to Leslie Knope courtesy of Ben’s butt-dial.
Leslie – “And this is how Eleanor Roosevelt would kiss…”
Parks also set up some good stuff for next season beyond the obvious Leslie/Ben/no dating rule. We saw Chris give (points fingers at) Ann Perkins a look, but wouldn’t no dating apply there too now? Entertainment 720, I imagine, will crash and burn at some point next season, but creator Mike Schur told Alan Sepinwall that E: 720 will be a “big story next season.”
April managing Mouse Rat will be fun, but the angle I look forward to most is the introduction of Tammy I. Anyone who can make Tammy II run away like that is someone we need to see. Can’t wait to see who gets that role. Mostly just can’t wait to visit Pawnee, Indiana again in the fall.

--I’m glad to see that the state Senate has its priorities straight and went ahead and passed the noodling bill sending it to Rick Perry’s desk. Don’t screw this up Rick. Life, liberty and the bare handed pursuit of catfish!

--Some people just aren’t supposed to die and Randy “Macho Man” Savage was near the top of that list. He was a true icon of the sport. Everything I needed to know about fairytale love I learned from Macho Man and Miss Elizabeth.

Now that was a true royal wedding that people needed to watch. Any fairytale that includes George “The Animal” Steele is an instant classic. George was like every other red blooded American man in the mid to late 80s. No we didn’t all enjoy the taste of turnbuckles, but we did all have a crush on Miss Elizabeth. We also all tried to imitate Randy’s strained voice. Drop an “ooooh yeah” anywhere in the world and you’re likely to find someone smiling thinking about Randy.

As the years went on Randy wasn’t the best worker in the ring, but he rocked the mic in and, to a slightly lesser degree, out of the ring. There was never any doubt that you weren’t getting 100% Macho Man anytime he was on the screen.
Interesting note I saw on Wikipedia. Savage had six world title reigns and all six ended with a loss to either Hulk Hogan or Ric Flair.
I just listened to “Pomp and Circumstance” for old time’s sake. Goosebumps.
RIP Macho Man.

FU Hulk Hogan.

--The toughest part about reading Game of Thrones was going through that part we saw in the second episode where that bit**-ass Joffrey and Queen Cersei whine enough to get Robert to order the death of Lady. Bit** as******
Episode 7 of Thrones on HBO Go immediately after episode 6 airs on HBO this Sunday? Works for me.

--Arnold cheated on Maria? Another former teammate saw Lance Armstrong use performance enhancers? I don’t know if my heart can take any more of this surprising and shocking news.

--Three-story brewpub. Downtown Houston. Works for me.

--Please basketball gods, don’t let it be the Mavericks and Heat in the Finals.

--Next week’s “Web Redemption” would have been cool during Tosh’s first season, but it’s going to be the "Boom Goes the Dynamite" guy.

--Love these color photos from the ‘30s and ‘40s that were part of an exhibit in 2006.

--In Some People Are Just A**holes news… The Pacific Northwest Football Officials Association decided to raise awareness and money for breast cancer. So last October 143 of these Seattle-area high school football referees decided to wear pink whistles and some decided to donate game checks. Nice, huh? So I guess that’s the end of that.
Of course it isn’t. The Washington Officials Association said that the pink whistles violated uniform code and only it could decide pink whistles would be okay. So it is revoking those 143 referees’ playoff game privileges the next couple of years and putting the Pacific Northwest Football Officials Association on probation for three years with a misstep possibly resulting in decertification and 143 refs out of work. Bravo, Washington Officials Association, bravo.

--A Walking Dead board game?!

In other zombie-related news it’s nice to see the Centers for Disease Control finally take an interest in the impending zombie revolution/apocalypse. I think the zombies will consider it a revolution, but I imagine we’ll see it as an apocalypse. Either way I hope it happens after work hours so I have a chance because 30 floors up downtown is not the ideal place to be when the sh** goes down.

--I abhor lines and I don’t abhor a lot of things. However I would gladly wait an hour in line at a Valero gas station if it was offering premium unleaded for $1.10 a gallon. That’s what one Valero in L.A. accidentally offered for several hours. Apparently there was a glitch in its matrix and the gas price defaulted to just over a buck. 7,000 gallons later and that Valero was out $21,000. Whoops. How you don’t notice this for several hours is beyond me. I mean when cops come in to regulate traffic because the lines are so long maybe you should try to figure out why you’re the most popular gas girl on the block.

--I like Gus Johnson but his whole “I’m not planning to watch the NCAA tournament” sounds ridiculously petty.

--If I don’t see you again because of the Rapture, thanks for reading.

Questions, comments or if your twin nephews who were born twelve weeks premature are celebrating their 2nd birthdays this weekend…


  1. congrats to the nephews. my twin nieces turn 2 in a couple weeks.

    Haven't written my P&R finale review yet because I wanted to watch it again first. maybe i'll just steal yours.

  2. Thanks. As someone who has no children two-year-olds are awesome.

    I've been waiting for your review for the finale because it was a helluva episode.


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