Tuesday, December 21, 2010

She robbed us blind - she took all we owned. And the boys blamed me for bringing her home.

In Memoriam

December 19, 2010. Boom goes the DVR.


Once I saw the red "X" I knew that my DVR library was only a vegetable who didn’t recognize my face and was in more pain living than it would be if I just let the always funny folks at AT&T wipe it clean. And wipe it they did. When the technician turned to me and told me what had to be done I assured him (lied to him) that I had made my peace with it before his arrival. And with that there went my Christmas vacation viewing.

Terriers – I never had time for you and that’s on me. I let your first and, sadly, only season get away from me for too long before I made up for it last weekend watching four straight episodes that got me down to the final two. I’ll miss you the most.

Awesomely crazy episode.

Community – I really wanted to start a Christmas Eve tradition of watching your stop-motion animation classic full of Jeff-in-the-Box, metaphor for Lost, humbugs and "Sad Quick Christmas Song." There’s always next year, well unless you get Parks and Rec’d.

Keeping Up with the Kardashians – You did this to my DVR didn’t you! You f’n attention whore! Yeah, I’m looking at you Scott, you ass. Look at what all of you turned Olympic legend Bruce Jenner in to. My DVR never had a chance against the 12 of you monsters recorded on it.

House – Yeah, two seasons of worth of House. Eh, not exactly shedding a tear.

Ricky Gervais Out of England 2 – HBO On Demand will have my back although why Lombardi isn’t On Demand is beyond me.

Run Ricky Run – I was gonna watch you again, I promise. But now that I think about it...Run Ricky Gervais Run would be the better show.

It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia – Christmas Special – You were gone before I ever got a chance to visit you. Merry Christmas to me.

Undeclared – IFC has given us the gift of quality re-runs like this and Freaks and Geeks. I watched the first four Undeclareds and almost stopped tripping every time Charlie Hunnam/Sons’ Jax came on the screen as Lloyd with an English accent.

Lost series finale – I probably would never have watched this again, but dammit! we need to go back to the island!

Game 5 of the 1980 NLCS between the Astros and Phillies – I recorded you for trips down memory lane, but was waiting until at least one Houston sports team was respectable to revisit those dark Philly memories.

Jersey Shore – I watched the first two of the last season, but had the rest recorded not that I was ever going to get around to watching them. RIP Angelina.

South Park - Damn, I wanted to see that Crème Fraiche episode.

Perfect Couples – You have the waitress from Sunny and Olivia Munn on so I was really looking forward to seeing them and wondering how long until Mary Elizabeth Ellis was back on Sunny and Munn was on to her next try.


Men of a Certain Age – You had good reviews and Scott Bakula and Andre Braugher. I missed your first season, but wanted to watch this one. Yeah, that’s not happening.

Mad Men - “The Suitcase” and “Tomorrowland” were some of your best episodes ever…that I’ll never see again.

Parenthood – My fiancée liked you and you weren’t half bad even though I’m not a big Craig T. Nelson fan after he got upset with Stevens and Pruett that one time. Yeah, I hold grudges for a long time. Still you had Lauren Graham and that was worth something.

Sons of Anarchy season three finale - What you lacked for during the season you made up for in the finale. RIP SOA finale. I hope one day to get the satisfaction again of seeing Opie’s final scene with Agent Stahl. That and Chibs drinking a Jameson’s juice box on the school bus.

Blais Off – Top Chef’s Richard Blais has a new show on Discovery Science that started last Friday. I’m expecting a molecular gastronomy version of Good Eats.

RIP DVR 7/10/2009 – 12/19/2010

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--Bernard Pollard: “It’s embarrassing to us, our fans and our families.”
Yes it is.

--I wasn’t sure I was going to like Scott Pilgrim vs. the World until I saw the credits roll and the cast it had. Kieran Culkin, Aubrey Plaza, Brandon Routh, Jason Schwartzman, Anna Kendrick and so on. Great cast and fun movie. I never read the comic books so have no idea how true it was or whatever, all I know is I liked the comic book/video game feel it gave off and the music was strong too.
“Bread makes you fat?”

Brandon Routh as the vegan ex was awesome, “I partake not in the meat, nor the breastmilk, nor the ovum, of any creature, with a face.”

--Good to hear Jack Huston/Richard Harrow in Boardwalk has been promoted to series regular next season.

--Finally got around to watching Lombardi. Damn fine work. But I couldn’t find it on U-verse On Demand. They have about 10 two-minute trailer/teasers, but not the actual program. That's AT&T for ya.

--Also checked out the 24/7 on the Penguins and Caps. 24/7 could make the Texans/Broncos feel like the Super Bowl is about to be played.

--Hey Giants, wanna trade punters?

--Surely you’ve seen it by now, but a hundred times is never enough. Anthony Pettis, who you may have seen on World of Jenks, with this video game kick…


--Somehow with possibly the worst/most inexperienced WR corps in the league Sam Bradford has gone over the 3,000 yard passing mark. The only other rookie quarterbacks to ever do that? Peyton Manning and Matt Ryan. Writing of Matt Ryan, he currently has 63 TD passes which is tied for 4th most for a QB in his first three seasons of play. The three guys ahead of him are Dan Marino, Peyton Manning and take a guess. Wrong. Jeff Garcia.

--Tony Romo and Candice Crawford 4evs!

--Wait, the NFC West lost all their games in the same week for the third time this season? That can’t be right. Yeah, one of those craptastic teams will host a playoff game. Makes perfect sense.

--Maybe you want to read about Dexter’s new showrunner or maybe you don’t. It’s like a Choose Your Own Adventure!

--I think the celebrity roasts have had their run, but to each their own. Next up? Donald Trump. Only way I’ll watch is if his apparent good friend Mike Leach gets a turn at the mic.

--Bret of Flight of the Conchords doing some of the songs for the upcoming Muppet Movie is great f'n news.

--Matt Dillon as an ex-boyfriend of Claire’s on Modern Family? Works for me.

--Just as we suspected it’s Rebecca Budig vs. Bethenny Frankel in the finals of Skating with the Stars. Apparently Bethenny is the new Bristol Palin among Stars voters. Go Greenlee!

Greenlee, Ryan and Kendall...those were the days.

--Bernard Hopkins, was that you in an entertaining fight over the weekend? Crazy. 45-year-old B-Hop and Jean Pascal fought to a majority draw in a fight that saw Hopkins hit the mat twice in the early rounds though they weren’t the most convincing knockdowns. One of my favorite radio moments was getting to interview Hopkins and trying to interpret B-Hop-ese on the fly. Something about the fans wanting to him grow wings and fly out of the ring. It made perfect sense at the time.

--Top Chef’s Casey Thompson is opening a second Brownstone restaurant. This one in Dallas. The first one is in Fort Worth. Casey explains the difference between the two, “It will have Dallas food, not Fort Worth food.” Uhhhhhhh, okay….

--If you’re keeping score at home it’s 15 straight double-doubles for Kevin Love.

--A movie about a fan suffering from the Madden cover curse. Is that something you’d be interested in? Of course not. Of course that won’t stop it from getting made.

--Blake Griffin put together three straight 20-point, 15-rebound games before having it snapped with a weak 22-point, 10-rebound effort Monday night. There have only been four other rookies who have done 20-15 in at least three straight games and two of them are Rockets? Guys named Tim Duncan, Shaq, Dream and Ralph Sampson.

--It’s good to be quarterback, any quarterback. Matt Flynn is a quarterback. His girl is Lacey Minchew who just happened to be Miss Louisiana in 2009.


--There’s really not much to add to this story from Morning Call (mcall.com):
“Court-ordered to undergo drug tests, a Monroe County man was caught wearing a fake penis and bladder used to cheat screens. But Raymond Hartley Jr. had a good excuse (naturally) for strapping on the Whizzinator, he told a Northampton County judge last week: The probation officers kept making fun of the size of his real penis."

--Heat is now 5-7 against teams currently over .500.

Questions, comments or if you made it through another Christmas without having to go to the mall for anything...

5 comments:

  1. Anonymous8:59 AM

    I was at the 1980 Astros's game 5, It's burned on memory, don't need no stinking dvr.

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  2. I felt the same misery when I lost Luke and Laura's wedding. And it wasn't even the first wedding.

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  3. Yeah but in one of these Houston classic losses we're going to win.

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  4. Our home was strictly Ryan's Hope and All My Children. General Hospital was naptime.

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  5. The same thing happened to me and my DVR around the same time it happened to you. Uverse sucks! But there aren't many other options for me. This is the 2nd time it's happened to me.

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