Friday, February 05, 2010

She's crafty - she's got a gripe. She's crafty - and she's just my type.

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--Seriously, as a nation we need to pull together. Both sides of the aisle. Blue states. Red states. Man. Woman. Child. Pet. We need change and we need it now! You know what I’m talking about. That’s right. Give us the Monday after the Super Bowl off!

--Not surprising I guess, but no team that has lost to Tampa Bay in the regular season has gone on to win the Super Bowl. That’s not good for Nawlunz.

--Ho-ly crap. I would freak the F out if Vanilla Ice was a surprise halftime entertainer at a Rockets game like he was at a Raptors game. “Play that Funky Music” and “Ice Ice Baby?” Oh hell yeah. “Go ninja, go ninja, go”

American Music Awards at its finest

--Heinz Dip AND Squeeze packets?! U-S-A! U-S-A!

--We head to Long Island for our example of good police work. A cop saw K.A. Frascinella in the HOV lane with a “friend.” But this friend was wearing sunglasses and a visor on a cloudy morning, hmmmmm. So the attentive cop pulled the 61-year-old woman over and found her friend to be a fully dressed (and matching I might add) half mannequin. It’s a $135 ticket andtwo points on her license. In other words, worth it.

--However that policeman isn’t the Cop O’ The Week. No, we head to Blountville, Tennessee for that honor. Samuel Bledsoe is/was a Sullivan County Sheriff’s Office deputy. So ‘twas a Friday night and Samuel was out having a good time with his father-in-law. A flat tire ensued and so a HELP (Highway Emergency Lane Patrol) trucker stopped to assist. He noticed a guy laying facedown in the snow beside the flat tire. That would be the intoxicated (ya think?) father-in-law. Samuel was enjoying a deep sleep in the car. So the cop wanted Samuel to do some field sobriety tests including one task that had to be repeated 18 times. 18?! Why not 15 and then just take him to jail? At that point Samuel started playing his I’m-a-cop card. I think that card loses some meaning when your passenger is passed out in the snow and you have vomit all over yourself. Samuel’s mother-in-law picked up her husband while Samuel got to go to jail. Then it got fun. First he tried to slam the door on one of the troopers. Then he started kicking the door of the cruiser forcing the cop to stop twice. After the second stop he put Samuel in the K-9 cage. Nice. After getting to the hospital to get blood drawn Samuel knew where this was going and said, “I hope you are proud of yourself for this and costing me my job.” Yeah, he was fired…even in Tennessee.

--Your 2011 Madden cover goes to…Drew Brees…or Reggie Wayne…or Jared Allen. I think this may be the first year I don’t get it. I must be getting old.

--I’ve never understood the people who crave Twitter followers like Snooki craves pickles. For example, Bills safety Donte Whitner. He wanted to get to 10,000 followers so he enlisted the help of Pro Football Talk to gain followers with the promise of Super Bowl tickets to a follower once 10,000 was reached. He got his 10,000 and then he decided to put in a ridiculous prerequisite to get the tickets – you had to guess the exact scores of both conference championship games. Obviously no one did. Donte’s ridiculous tweet about all this: "There's plently of people that were 'close' some almost dead on. But I never said close I said guess the was fair!”

--First Palmer Cortlandt/James Mitchell and now Alice Horton/Frances Reid from Days has left us.

--Bill Murray on No Reservations Monday night. That should be interesting. I still can’t get over that guy in Prague last week who was filling sausage casings fast and furious with his bare hands.

--If I had a Facebook I’d definitely join the group “Betty White to Host SNL (please)?"

Betty White circa 1830

--Maybe it was just the inebriated state I was in, but the season premiere of Important Things with Demetri Martin was very strong the other night.

--Rob Riggle getting his own show?!

--I’ll hardly watch any of the Winter Olympics, but I will see how the lone Peru representative who took up skiing at the age of 34 after coming to America to meet his online love of his life does. Because that’s kind of a compelling story.

--More Super Bowl halftime fun including the forgettable nod to Indiana Jones.

Questions, comments or if your body clock is starting to piss you off waking you up at 6:13 every day this week…


  1. I was a little behind on my No Reservations, only caught up on Brittany this week. The final scene where he took apart that entire shellfish tray, truly impressive. They do a version of that at Pesce that's about $100. Maybe if you have Mark Holley on Southbound he'll bring you one.

  2. I missed that episode. Towers of Shellfish are the best kind of towers in my book. But I like you're thinking on how to get my hands on one. Reef's 3rd Bar Plateau is pretty nice.

  3. Is that waking up at 6:13 AM or PM?

  4. AM and apparently even on Saturday. Awesome

  5. Anonymous12:00 PM

    I guess EA thought if they put three the curse will only affect one a la hair polmalu. My money is on Jared Allen to feel the affect of the curse.

  6. It's going to only be one of those guys but I wouldn't mind seeing Jared Allen cursed. Hair Polamalu is awesome.

  7. This was the first year I didn't get Madden since the beginning of the series. In fact, after 2 red ring of deaths in a 3 month span, I am without a console for the first time in ~30 years. Maybe I'll just go back to Intellevision.

  8. Without a console is something I can't even imagine. Coleco >>> Intellivision. Hated Intellivision's controllers.

  9. Anonymous9:39 AM

    I thought people knew the mannequin is old news. You hire a hooker to ride with you now.

  10. A hooker before and after work does seem like a good rule of thumb.


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