Thursday, May 28, 2009

I Can't Stand Rocking When I'm In Here. Because Your Crystal Ball Ain't So Crystal Clear.

Quick Hitters and Random Thoughts

--As if we needed another reason to hate the Lakers...Apparently Tyrese sang the national anthem before Game 5 and changed the lyrics. Instead of "our flag was still there" he went with "our Lakers were still there." Come again? F U LA.

--How sick of Brett Favre is everybody? Well now you have former television hosts like Fran Tarkenton from That's Incredible running smack on the old man who won't stay the hell away. Fran on the fun with the Packers last offseason, " In this day and time, we have glorified the Brett Favre’s of the world so much, they think it’s about them. He goes to New York and bombs. He’s 39 years old. How would you like Ray Nitschke in his last year (playing for) the Vikings, or I retire, and go play for the Packers. I kind of hope it happens, so he can fail.” Goooo onnnn..."I think he has been a great flamboyant quarterback, but he has made more stupid plays than any great quarterback that I’ve ever seen." is very cool. Walt won’t get the donations, but the National Cancer Coalition will. Love that show.

--Saw Star Trek and of course JJ Abrams and company knocked it out the park. The only way it could have been better is if The Smoke Monster was somehow involved. That and Kate.

--It’s not enough for you to simply count your blessings and marry her Marko, you had to impregnate her too?

--How had I never seen Way of the Gun?

--Our Neighbors of the Week come to us from Lenoir, North Carolina. ‘Twas there that one man’s dog killed his neighbor’s cat. So obviously it’s on. The guy who had the cat then shot the other guy’s dog. That guy wasn’t messing around so he came out and shot the cat owner and for good measure he shot the guy’s 8-year-old daughter as well. Those two are okay. Once the sheriff’s deputies came out the crazy guy had more targets. So he shot two deputies before getting shot and killed himself. The deputies are supposed to be okay. Lesson is, never own a cat.

--Stephanie Tanner/Jodie Sweetin has a memoir coming out? I hope its title isn't some stupid spin off her last name. Title is UnSweetined. Whew, I thought for sure it'd be something dumb.

--Fast Food Fail: Burger King’s Fried Apple Slices.

--I know you will find this shocking, but apparently there was violence reported in Michigan the other day. This is what happens when you try to cross the streams. The streams in this case are football and baseball. Lee Wilson on his brilliant idea that was hatched waaay back in 1951, “I was at Michigan versus Illinois game and Michigan had the ball on the 4-yard line with a first down, and they then they lost the game because the gun went off. And I thought, ‘What a stupid way to run a ballgame.’” Stupid like a fox. Mr. Wilson convinced semi-professional teams the Motor City Soldiers and Wayne County Bengals (Bengals shoulda been a red flag) to try out the innings idea at a local high school. Everything was fine, if not stupid, until the 9th of the scheduled 12-inning game. At that point a collision spilled over into one of the team’s benches and Detroit ensued complete with fans jumping into the fracas. If you want to learn more about innings in football then you like baseball waaaay too much.

--Freddie Prinze Jr. on 24 is about right. As long as you can almost convey one emotion, lose someone despite a perimeter and have zero allegiance then you’re qualified.

--Seeing as how Sonia Sotomayor has that baseball background we got some baseball analogy goodness from our nation’s lone sane voice, Glenn Beck: “Right now, it's the bottom of the ninth and we are down to our last out and our last strike. Will our government take strike three looking? Or, will they wake up and save the day with a heroic three pointer on a penalty shot?”
And now we know why the Astros suck…no three-point hitters.

--I’d like to go ahead and predict Erin Andrews as your next Dancing With The Stars champion. She admitted to The Sporting Blog that she wants in. It’s on ABC so obviously this will happened and obviously this will be the only way I watch a second of next season.

--If you see a Boost Mobile ad begin and Danica Patrick is in it, change the channel IMMEDIATELY. Unless, well, unless you liked seeing Andre Smith run the 40 at the combine.

--Sadly I haven't watched Season 3 of Dexter yet, but Season 4 has a very promising cast addition in John Lithgow.

--Battlestar's Katee Sackhoff would make a perfect Typhoid Mary. I have zero idea what would constitute a perfect Typhoid Mary, but Katee would be perfect.

--Apparently Summer Glau is going from Terminator to Dollhouse. Good luck with that Summer.

--I gave Goode Family 10 minutes, which was 10 minutes too long.

--So instead of Rampage/Lyoto we're getting Rampage and Sugar on the next Ultimate Fighter. I think Rampage is avoiding a loss, but how does he turn down a shot for the belt?

--Yes LPGA encouraging golfers to tweet during rounds will, no doubt, lead to relevance.

Questions, comments or if you're the proud uncle of very early bird twins named Jack and Andrew...


  1. Brock Sampson2:11 PM

    Katee Sackhoff would make a perfect anything.

    I can't believe you hadn't seen Way of the Gun. The only good thing Ryan Phillippe has ever done, besides Reese Witherspoon. One of the most criminally underrated movies ever.

  2. they could have done another half hour alone just in the bar with benicio and james caan. benicio had some killer lines.

  3. I don't know what is more shocking, Gleen Beck's bad metaphor or that FP2 keeps getting hired.
    I think the Rampage to TUF is them trying to save that show. he ratings keep going down and they hope that the legot heat between him and Suga will equal ratings ala Tito-Shamrock.
    They just need to quit worrying about setting up future fights and just have good entertaining coaches. First choise is Serra v Tito. Both of these guys like to coach and are money on TV. Throw in some guest appearances by Stankie and you have ratings gold.
    There is a rumor that Dancing wants Kurt Angle for the next season.

  4. i can see trying to help TUF's ratings. i've barely kept up with this season. serra will always be good on that show considering his mouth and it looks like he's a real coach.
    angle on Dancing? "you suck" chants from bruno or the crowd will get me to watch.


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